White Lightning Axiom: Redux

Yesterday was fairly uneventful. At TSD practice, I was one of the more prominent 'Father Figures' on the mat. Ok, at the time I was the ONLY one, so I lent my pedagogical skills in herding the peanut gallery and giving advice in areas such as which is the left foot and which is right or how to form a straight line. For my efforts, I was thanked by the instructor. I guess life experience does amount to something. The Adult Class had only 3 students so I was the recipient of unprecedented attention. Sometimes a good thing, sometimes an exhausting and austere event. This time, a little of both. Frankly, it's a good thing I'm only doing this three times a week, the shock to my system could be irreversible else wise. On the upside, I sustained no grievous injury this time.

Anyone who knows me or has read much in this chronicle of my mid-life understands that I have a particularly severe and unrelenting sensitivity regarding the innocence and general well being of children. Not only my own, but markedly those who are in distress. This morning, the Tyrants selected some toys to bring in for Show-n-Tell. A highly anticipated and beloved event. Alexis brought in her MORE lethal crowd control microwave emitter and Jake wanted to show off his pimped out stryker with anti-anti-armor ballistics armor and anti ECM package. Ok, it was really a Barbie and some hot-wheels ... but I KNOW what they wanted to bring in, but Mom said no. Yet again, I digress. So I'm depositing the Tyrants at the DayCare/ReEducation Compound when a howl of discontent followed by uncontrollable sobbing breaks out from across the room. A little girl is standing over her shattered snow globe. Fine shards of razor sharp glass has spread about the floor as if they were an army of invisible fire ants. Mrs Tina rushes in to start the mop-up but as any parent knows, a flurry of activity will inevitably attract the attention of the littlest one. They want to help, don't you know. Doing some quick math in my head (10 children, 10 fingers each, 14/5 soft and fleshy targets per finger) I deduced that there were not enough band aids even at the Mayo Clinic to cover this catastrophe. My daddy powers surged and I knew it was now or never. So I asked, hey, do you guys know where there are any costumes or capes? It was as if someone had thrown a box of Jelly Donuts into a Richard Simmons Aerobics demonstration. The all bolted at the same time for the opposite corner of the room where the 'Pretend, Obfuscate and Subterfuge' play area was. Crisis averted. Of course, Erin, was still crushed at the loss of her little ballerina snow globe. She no longer had her prized possession for show-n-tell. Well, you know what this did to me and I had no choice. The Hallmark store opens at 0930 so after I spent some time at work, I snuck off to pick up a new globe and delivered it to her during class. Of course, this was from Santa who I bumped into on the way over. He was watching and saw that she was so sad so he asked me to drop off a Micky/Minnie Holding Hands globe to make her feel better. As I scuttled out the door, all her classmates huddled about her to see the Early Christmas present and the reddened eyes shown bright with joy. I'm kinda hoping that she does not feel too bad that it is not a pink ballerina. While I was out on the 'mission to get the supplies to the settlement', I picked up some nick-nack toys to drop in the Marines Toys for Tots barrel too. At least I know that I feel better. Even though, I know, this was a reflex reaction and not my Free Will (yes, there is sarcasm there).

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Technorati Tags:Karate | Children | Christmas

Labels: Banalities

Well now, that was an intriguingly rough 24 hours. The day started out with me having to deal with a prick. A needle prick. Well, an inoculation for the influenza virus actually. Having to deal with injections on my own for so long actually made this simple for me. Really. The whole process took about 15 minutes. From me racing off from my keyboard to me plopping back down in the same rather uncomfortable seat. Having someone else about to do the dirty deed really makes the whole process much easier. I'm sure the insurance company would not be entirely thrilled with a heard of needle shy folks trying to invade their own bodies with sharp pointy objects though. There would be very little alacrity among those for whom the needle tolls for that methodology. Of course, after 12 hours have passed, the general dull pain sets in as the bellicose hyper immune system kicks in. As the last member of the Manor Haupertonian to get the shot, I'm fairly lucky that no grave illness set upon me before now. Being a rather cynical sort of guy, I can only assume that now a new strain of the flu will rise and strike me down. At least I did the right thing up to this point.

My trek across the my now diminished territory (radius of 18 kilometers) was fraught with interruptions for no logical reason. No accidents mind you. Just a chance encounter with a fire truck on the way to the Day care/ReEducation facility for the Swim/Underwater Demolitions Pickup and then a chance encounter with a police cruiser on the way to TSD Karate/5 Point Death-Blow training. Hah, no emergency vehicles on the way to work though. Must have been on the wrong road. In any event, swimming went very well and in a fit of sagacity, the Tyrants insisted that I find diving targets for them. They want to be able to search the pool bottom for treasure. It was particularly interesting to see them so focused on doing laps and such. They really impressed the daylights out of the older ladies in the pool. Jake actually STALKED them at times, suddenly surfacing near them, launching battlefield nuclear torpedoes and then slipping away beneath the waves like some UBoat of ages past. After their hour was up, they were sufficiently exhausted so as to offer no incorrigible resistance regarding my calls for retreat. I'm still amazed at how long they can hold their breath and how far they can swim when submerged. I'll have to check their torso and neck to see if they have surreptitiously grown gills of some sort. I'll wager that if they have, the boys down in the genetics research lab have been compromised. Most likely blackmail.

Karate went splendidly in the first hour. Yes, there is a caveat there for a reason and I'll get to that in a moment. Both of the Wonder Twins actually listened today. Alexis more so than Jake. He's a lover, not a fighter. In any event, their practice kicks are getting very powerful and I'll consider setting up a kick-pad for them in the basement should they ask. That, or if they crush my tibia with one of their adapted flying side kicks. Deadly. The Mrs picked them up at promptly 1900 hours and I started in on the adult class as planned. It's not an hour. It's not 90 minutes. Its one hour and 45 minutes. The ribs are not prime time yet and recidivist nature of my interstitial muscles to fall back on delivering blinding pain was inevitable. You know you are in over your head when you beg for jumping jacks or '6 inches'. Yeah, you want to know what type of Medieval torture technique this could be? Hold your heels 6 inches above the mat, hands behind your head and legs straight out. Call me after 90 seconds. Frankly, I though I would have worked out all the kinks in the first 30 minute warm up with the kids session, but no. I was sweating up a storm till the bottomless well of bodily fluids surprisingly ran dry. And although my comprehension and technique can be classified somewhere between extraordinarily poor and tabula rasa (blank slate), the other participants gleefully accept me since they all have to wait for me to complete my sets ... they rest in blissful inactivity.

Now here is the nadir of my efforts. In my quest to become inured within the boundaries of the art, I am pushing my own limits but taking care to not damage my already decrepit joints. Indeed, I was prepared to declare victory as I was strolling off the mat when in my exhaustion, I failed to pick my foot off the mat fully and caught the 2nd toe (from the big one) on my left foot on a crease. Now, I have very little control of these digits beyond the large one. I cannot wiggle them and simple manual manipulation registers very little sensation. This is why I wear boots. As I drag my foot over the crease, I hear a little sssnICK and look down to see the rogue little ronin curled under my foot. I would have winced in pain if it had happened. I thought nothing of it till I arrived at the manor and found that the same toe had become an angry, dark purple auslander amongst it's peers. Putting pressure on it delivered an crisp reply of throbbing pain. Nice. Well, at least it does not hurt when I laugh.

Finally, I wanted to share this one last development within the walls of the manor with you. I have started a new activity with the Tyrants. Every night after dinner, I pull out a large tome. It's like the internet, but printed on paper. Hyperlinks don't work on it, but it does not require an outlet or network card. Apparently, it is made of pulverized and bleached trees. Weird. Anyways, there are words in this book and the front of the hard cardboard cover is mislabeled as a 'Dictionary'. No matter, it serves a purpose. Each night, I ask the kids for a letter from the alphabet. We go to a page within that section and pick out a word that we spell, pronounce and define. That is the word of the day and we don't leave the table till both of the Tyrants spell and say the word. I then highlight the word with a marker along with one of the more applicable definitions. I'm hoping that this will amount to something. If, by chance, you happen upon a person who can recite the entire Random House Dictionary circa 1976, you know who you are talking to so take great care.

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Technorati Tags:Swimming | Karate | Children | Commute | Injury

Labels: Banalities

Back by popular demand ...

Title: SPAM HASHBROWN BAKE
Categories: Main dish
Yield: 8 Servings

1.00 pk Frozen hashbrown potatoes, -thawed slightly (32 oz)
0.50 c Butter[ed: use bacon fat here ... mmmm] or margarine, melted
1.00 t Salt
1.00 t Pepper
0.50 t Garlic powder
2.00 c Shredded Cheddar cheese
1.00 cn SPAM Luncheon Meat, cubed -(12 oz)
1.00 cn Cream of chicken soup -(10 3/4 oz)
1.50 c Sour cream
0.50 c Milk [ed: use heavy cream here]
0.50 c Chopped onion
0.25 c CHI-CHI's Diced Green -Chilies, drained
2.00 c Crushed potato chips [ed: use chow mein or onion fries too!]

Heat oven to 350'F. In large bowl, combine potatoes, melted butter,
salt, pepper, and garlic powder. In another bowl, combine cheese,
SPAM, soup, sour cream, milk, onion, and green chilies. Add SPAM
mixture to potato mixture; mix well. Pour into 2-quart baking dish.
Sprinkle with potato chips. Bake 45-60 minutes or until thoroughly
heated.

Just makes your mouth water, no?

Technorati Tags:Spam | Health Food

Labels: PSA

Since everyone out there was fairly wound up with giving thanks (except Zen, of course, for her own good reason) on Turkey Day, it was fairly quiet out there on the wire. I had to pick through and find those hearty souls who were dripping gravy on the keyboard while watching the inflated characters float down 34th Street. For the 80th time apparently.

Speaking of hot air blowing, apparently the Fall Wind Season has finally come to a halt up there in Alaska. AK-Michelle is more than relieved to be able to go out and not be whisked away to Oz along with the disgruntled cattle. She, of course, denies that she is a Snow-Bird in the making. And you know, I never heard of someone hoping it would warm up a bit so it WOULD snow. Damn, that's cold! Reminds me of that one winter in Minnesota where Gramps went out to the barn to light up a heater for the cows and the damn flame froze on the match!

Sister Jane has finished her migration and finally arrived here in the land of Eastern Standard Time and is busy rattling around her new empty house like a BB in a gnat's ass. The problem with moving into a new, large and rather empty space is how your fill it. Ikea will have a good quarter.

UK-Dave is busy with preparing for the arrival of his favorite bird. Not the US variety, but quite the catch for him. I'll expect to hear very little from him in the near future but the after-glow will probably shine for quite some time. Speaking of an irrepressible glow, Zee has found that as you age, certain things you could once eat become verboten. She has a bit of an issue with the veggie that is a fruit, and I do feel quite sorry for her predicament. No more hot tomato soup to chase away the winter chill ... she will have to stick to chicken soup. A bird of a different feather entirely.

Speaking of birds and migration, Suzy has a little open thread going on over at her corner (and ever expanding corner it is!) of the web. A little issue that seems to be getting only one side of the argument exercised about illegal immigration. If you have an opinion (who doesn't?), go on over and leave a note. She could use the input. Think of it this way, you have an opportunity to influence one of the influencers!

And now for the peanut gallery. Not so much that they have not a spec of influence, I just cannot seem to find any reference to birds, migration or and avian theme to tie them in. So here is the grab-bag of featured bloggers: Karyl cum Noah is finding that a 21 year old son, a 90 lb 'killer' dog and 3 cats in the ark can make for a very interesting holiday season. Perhaps she can send out the dove with an olive branch? (Ah-HAH! I got a bird in that hand, now for 2 in the bush.) Heidi over at just above the abyss is a MS blogger new to me so drop in and read about her Ducks Unlimited banquet ... she has a lot to say and puts me to task with the length of her posts. Yet another Nanook-Canook in the Haupertonian MS Cabal. I swear they are taking over. Finally, shoester, the legal eagle (HAH, three birds with one stone! Damn I'm good.) has a clip from an article regarding the newest anti-inflammatory potential product ... from of all places, Avon. Apparently, this has been tested on animals. Gorillas ... by their own accord! I wonder what the animal activists will have to say about our cousins w/o opposable thumbs crashing the Vioxx/Celebrex/Bextra market. And if it causes health issues, will they be liable for fraud!?

Crossposted from Charles's site as a service to mankind!

Technorati Tags:Multiple+Sclerosis | Heros

Labels: Heros, Multiple Sclerosis

Yep, back to the grind ... as fine and satin soft as it may be. I got up a bit late on Monday morning, but managed to light a fire under the super-mass that composes my hind-quarters. The kids are suffering from Grandparent withdrawal as well. They are used to ambling into the master bedroom at an early hour and snuggling down between the accommodating and willing despoilers for an extra hour of snooze time. Nope, won't do. Although, I truly wish that I could do the same. Alas, it's time to pay the piper so as to stave off the waves of pestiferous rodents. I'm certain that this reed instrument toting kidnapper would think twice after trying to lure my two 'music lovers' away though. It's hard to prance about with a flute crammed up your nose ... or elsewhere.

Since we were AWOL from the Manor over the weekend, we have limited provisions of the fresh fruit and vegetable variety in the larder. Sure; the deep freeze is loaded with angus beef, free range chicken and all manner of pork presentations ... but that is weekend stuff. Just a few withered apples, a few spotted bananas and some clementines. I have a whole shelf of dried fruit at work, but it's just not the same. I'll let you know how many pounds I shed by Friday ... I'm doing double TSD on Tues/Wed/Thurs in addition to the swimming now so I'll wager it may be significant. Speaking of seeing ribs, mine are better now ... just some minor tenderness. I'll be making quite sure to protect them this evening.

Oh, and for all your who are interested, gasoline is at $2.23USD here ... the Mrs can get it for a bit less near her place of employment. Never made it to $1.37, did it?

Technorati Tags:Gas | Swimming | Karate | Children | Food

Labels: Banalities

The weekend worked out pretty well. I suppose. There was that little bit of a migraine on Friday afternoon. The synergistic combination of that and the still aching ribs pretty much kicked my but for a large chunk of Friday. While I was laid low, the Mrs decided to see another man behind my back. Of course, it was the Big Little Brother and their shared love was that of buying new electronic gadgetry. The siren call of disk drives, CD ROM writers and Flat Screen monitors was too much to resist for them on Black Friday. I am truly blessed to have a Mrs who is driven mad by the latest software rather than Prada shoes. As the day grinds on and the credit line grows shorter, I start to feel like my old self again. I watch the tube for a bit, read some of my six sigma book and go for a walk with the dogs and Jake. At one point, some of the neighborhood dogs come out to investigate the lumbering juggernauts ambling down the lane, but a swift jerk of the leash helped keep the little morsels from being gobbled up. Noting of real note. It is currently hunting season so we did not venture off into the woods. Sure, there is not supposed to be any hunting near by. But there are a lot of things that should not happen and having the common sense to not be in a place where shotgun slugs may be flying is a good thing.

Saturday brought more of the same. I spent some time with Hero Dad putting an epoxy patch on the monster chainsaw. The handle had a crack in it from a kickback incident so a good dual component epoxy with fiberglass mesh was in order. Stank like all get-out too. It takes 5 minutes to bind, 8 hours to cure and 24 hours for a workable solution. After chipping the chemical bond from my nails, we went out to put up the lights on the FOB (yes, we wait till AFTER thanksgiving to start our Christmas celebration) and then head out to get a tree for the kids to decorate. We have been going to the same 'you cut' place for a few years now. Its on the property of a couple of retired folks. He came from Finland back in 1957 and she is an American born Fin. Great folk. They are related in some way to a man I worked for a long time ago. Mark Haag was a pretty good boss, but he and his Mrs smoked like a pair 1945 diesel mac trucks in a North Dakota winter. That would be the end of them both. The fellow, I believe his name is Hammon, spends his year getting ready for the December. If you are in the area, it's called Southview - 630 South Danby Road, Spencer NY,. Yeah, I'm pimping for a tree vendor. But hey, the trees cost about 20$ so he is not making much of any profit from it. Back at the FOB, the kids completely cover the tree in decorations and it looks great. Pictures were taken and reside snugly within the camera yet. The Mrs and I will probably skip the usual 80 foot tree this year at the Manor since we'll be up at the FOB again for the next week long holiday. No need in having dead horticulture around when there will be nobody to see it. Sounds like a philosophical question, eh?

The rest of the time off was not very interesting. Wash the hounds, go to evening Mass, get up late Sunday, eat brunch, pack 100 metric tons of electronic goodies into the Family Tank v2.0 and hit the road by 1320 hours. Other than Alexis throwing up three times along the way, it was a fairly anti-climatic end to a wonderful time with the Grandparents. Of course, the kids were very unhappy to leave. Spoiled to the core they are. Now, my greatest task for the next week will be cooking up a year-end Christmas letter. When you chronicle every hangnail, zit and hiccup you have on a daily basis, trying to condense it all down to one sheet, WITH pictures can be daunting.

Technorati Tags:Children | Family

Labels: Weekend

It was a rocky start at the beginning of our 4 hour cruise to the FOB, but after a few daisy cutters and a judicious helping of pulse plasma cannons, we managed to pound through all the crazies on the turnpike. Of course, there was only one way to make sure so we nuked em from orbit before doing a fast descent at 1930 hours. The hounds were happy to get out of the back of the Family Tank and the Grandparents were happy to be let out of the locked cloak-room.

Normally, I would be a bit more witty about this, but I'm in a serious food coma right now. On TDay proper, the Mrs and I slept in a bit, watched the Macy's Day parade and the usual Philly Dog show afterwards. Only then did I able out into the cold afternoon air with the hounds. One of the back-woods neighbors was out stacking firewood so I ambled over to have a short man-talk with him. He had just finished hunting and got his first buck on day one. We talked about venison sausage, dogs, hunting and wood stoves. It was the best conversation I've had in a long while. Made my day, it did. On the walk back through the woods and through the gully back to the fortified FOB on the banks of Haupertonain Creek, I paused to think a bit about things I should be thankful for. I really don't do that as often as I should. Frankly, I should probably do it every time I manage to walk away from one of my commutes. Fortunate for the likes of me, we have a day set aside specifially to think about it. I guess things like The Tyrants, Over Achiever Grandparents, Absurdly Affectionate Mrs and a Job with a short commute and 401k matching should top the list. And the Internet ... and the Manor, the Swim club, karate, surviving a car wreck with nary a scratch, other-worldly good health would follow that up. Of all things, I should consider above all the obvious benefit of God's influence in my life. I have no other way to explain how I have not buried myself by now. That, and all of you avid bloggers out there who egg me on to keep on keeping on. Here is a Happy Thanksgiving day wish for all you and your family. May God's grace shower down upon you in the buckets that I am blessed with.

Technorati Tags:Thanksgiving | Family | Food

Labels: Thanksgiving

A day late and a dollar short, isn't that the way it always is. So, I'm finally recovered enough to talk about Tuesday night. You see, I can be a bit thick-headed at times. For some reason, a few goofy ideas got wedged into my addled brain and I was compelled to act on them. Maybe it was the absence of the usual pounding I get from the Tyrants, but I felt it was necessary to supplement my daily routine with a bit of strife. Perhaps it was all that steak-n-taters I had Monday night. Either way, I had a bit of spare time on my hands so I thought that it would be neat to attend the Adult TSD class as well as the children's one that ran from. I felt a bit goofy attending w/o the Tyrants, but I'm going to miss the rest of the week so I could use the extra lesson. That, and since I was so easily surprised by the test, it would be in my best interests to check out what the content of the later class had to offer. First off, it is 90 minutes long. Second, the warm-up is not punctuated with requests to go to the bathroom or the admonitions by the instructors regarding what the failure to do particular activities would result in. No, it was pushup-situp hell. And then, it was an unending loop of combinations that deflated any ego I had left in reserve. The master told me to not loose hope, and that the rest of the class was happy to have me there since it gave them a rest between sets since I needed repeated instruction and correction. After the infinite loop of forms, of which I repeated my highest nearly a dozen times ... incorrectly, we went to the single move defense forms. I believe I know 1 through 5 ... of course, I learned that my sloppy punches have consequences when thrown at black-belts. You see, if I'm doing this with children who stand half my height and a quarter of my weight, I need to move in a bit closer so they can contact me correctly. Their blows to my body are like the birds bouncing off concrete buttresses after eating too many fermented berries. I was complacent. So I throw a standard punch at the highest ranking black-belt in the class, complete with my standard over-reaching lunge. THUD-CRAAACKK-wheeeezzeeee The first thud is that of his fist coming up into my rib-cage. It was supposed to be an outside block, but my lumbering mass got in the way of that. The creaking of my skeletal frame was heard across the mat as I went down like a 55 gallon sack of Jello cubes. The last noise before the brilliant flash of spreading pain was the last of the stale air escaping from my musty lungs though my gaping may, rent open by the shock of the blow. As I slowly hoist my unwilling body from the floor, my opponent profusely apologizes for the sound defeat. No, no, I'm fine ... just a few bruised ribs ... used to it, I'm a daddy. Indeed, the strident adherence to correct form will now be my mantra. This old dog does learn new tricks. Especially after a sound beating.

NOTE: This is not the person who whooped me, though she probably could with nary a spec of effort. And effort was something I was not entirely interested in exerting for the rest of that evening. I retreated to the Manor to lick my wounds. I did NOT wash the dogs. I did NOT sand the floor. I ate a bowl of mashed taters with a fist full of ibuprofen in the futile attempt to belay the inevitable. Flash forward several hours, the Capable and semi-OCD Mrs has loaded up the Family Tank II with the provisions for the weekend Thanksgiving Retreat to the FOB. I'm in charge of the 4 hour long piloting activity. The hounds, they are in charge of whimpering and whining the whole damn way. Have a happy Thanksgiving, I'll post if I can manage to reach the keyboard after feasting upon the bounty waiting for us at the FOB.

Technorati Tags:Karate | Dogs

Labels: Banalities

What to say, what to say. Recently, I've been running into some commentary regarding the fiction of free will. One author postulated that we are merely a gaggle of fleshy robots grinding our way through existence though the whim of our programming. We only do things that our brain has been set up to allow us to do. If we are genetically predispositioned to be an alcoholic, a pedophile, be overweight, a gambling addict and so forth, then it will be so. What this nihilistic philosopher of the electron bully pulpit has forgotten is that we have the free will to choose NOT to do these things. If you like to eat (like me) and you see that cake, you know it will be particularly delicious. Sure, you can shove the whole thing down your maw but you'll know there are CONSEQUENCES for that hedonistic engagement. Likewise, if you are genetically marked to get MS, what happens after that (if you should be diagnosed) is really up to you. You can lie down and die or you can take charge and move on. I get really wound up whenever some bit-rate blow-hard jumps on the kitsch pop culture bandwagon and blathers that we are just mindless robots moving through a time-line. No, I have will, I have choice and I have a goal. To fail so absurdly to adhere to critical thinking is a crime ... a capital crime, against the higher mind. So let these myopic twiddle-bots spout their slander against humanity, I have not the inclination nor the self-doubt to sop up their vitriolic spew. With that, I will engage in some free will and selfless acts that are NOT within my programming. Charles was the recipient of a cry for help and I feel compelled to pass it along.

Marlene Askew asks for assistance in finding 2 escapees from NO-Katrina. Last seen in flight from I-610, in the Gentilly section of the city. No names, just a young Man and his MS wife. I'm pretty sure it is not Friday's Child (who has just moved back into their home ... cheers!), but if you are out there, just send a note to Charles to let him inform Mrs Askew that all is right in the world. In this age of stolen identity and medical data clearance ... bloggers have become the Ham Radio Operators for finding lost souls.

Sancho Knotwise (jm) has found that MS is full of little nasties. One of the less damaging, but entirely annoying symptoms has been his unwanted companion of late. A pestiferous nagging companion at that. As a fellow sufferer of facial tics, I really can identify with his annoyance. Especially with it is one of those sensitive muscles about the eyes. That kind of thing is only interesting when the Tough Cop Movie Anti-Hero has an uncontrollable facial tic, not when you are trying to read a book.

Speaking of small annoyances, Mouse (no, she is not a small annoyance ... SHEESH!) has been spending some time with a new hobby. Squirrel Spotting. Now, the abundant population of these buggers on the Haupertonian Grounds tends to result in an aggressive Mutual of Omaha Wild Kingdom Live Trapping and Relocation program, but when they are not chewing up the bird feeders or digging up the flower bulbs they can be quite a treat to watch. See what she has to note about her crafty clutch of furry neighbors.

Of course, Miss Suzy has her own issues with the varmint population near her homestead. Like that strange cousin from out of state or the Creepy Uncle who likes to use the bathroom without closing the door, the uninvited and unwanted guests are stating to show up for thanksgiving. Of course, even the most egregiously uncouth relative does not leave droppings in the cereal or chew holes in your pantry provisions. Like white blood cells chewing at your myelin, they (the rodents) tend to spoil everything. Of course, this is has more to do with the pockets of little boys than anything. Give it a read, I had a pretty good laugh.

Back to Free Will. I seem to write much too often about Miss Chris. The Ever Patient Mrs is starting to get jealous! Of course, the affection is a mere interest regarding children and karate. Recently, the Scion of Chris has been dealt an administrative defeat in a martial arts tournament and the nature of fairness in the world is a hot topic in her comments. In an academic sense, it has analogies to MS that can be quite obvious and not very pretty. Life can be quite unfair given the nature of man. But much like our attitudes regarding MS, it is how we handle our defeats that defines us as successes or failures.

Crossposted from Charles's site as a service to mankind!

Technorati Tags:Heros | Multiple Sclerosis

Labels: Heros, Multiple Sclerosis

Okay, work has been oddly ... interesting of late so my morning coffee-n-blog time has evaporated like snake piss at high noon in death valley. As a really big cop out , I'm just going to relay the details about the inexorable events in my march to oblivion:

Thursday: No accidents on the way to work but yet another handicap ramp parking bastard was encountered. I left a note that looked an awful lot like a parking ticket that basically said, 'This is not a parking space, thank-you.'. Other than that water-related disturbance, we got one other. A water bill for our sprinkler system ... for non-use. Yep, 35$ for not using water. They were supposed to remove the meter last month. A guy came out, shut off the water but never removed the meter from the pit. Guess it was too wet for him. The Mrs ripped into customer support so they promised to reverse the bill and donate one kidney to the charity of her choosing. Oh, and Alexis got her stripe in karate. That is all. ;)

Friday: Busy at work, Grandparents showed up at 2030 and made the kids head's explode. So much for them conquering the world when their weakness is so blatant. The Grandparents are going to kidnap the kids and bring them to the FOB on Sunday so the Mrs and I can have a few days to ourselves. We are certainly looking forward to THAT! Additionally, we are now bathing the kids separate. They are getting to the age where differences are readily apparent. Modesty ... it's not Alexis's strong point. The up side is that Jake is very interested in taking showers instead of baths. That saves us a bit of hot water.

Saturday : Alexis gets her flu shot and barely even noticed it. I'm the remaining family member to be inoculated ... man do I hate needles. Later in the day, the Mrs and I abandon the Tyrants with the crafty and ever capable grandparents so we can go to a christening reception. As with all things asian, this was more like a grand celebration of a wedding than a low-key event I would expect. The father is a friend of mine from employment past and he has married into a Filipino family. He got a quick education on what is edible and what is not. The later category is really very slim. At the event, we were seated next to our friends the Goodroads ... it made the whole 60 mile trip out to Reading worth the effort. While we were gone, SuperDad raked up all my leaves for the township to cart away. He makes me look like such a slug.

Sunday: Sunday School, plant some bulbs, take the kids out for Santa Pictures. This year, Alexis actually smiled and did not try to disembowel the Santa Stand-in. Good thing, we were starting to get black-listed for her Santa Slaying behavior.

Monday: With the Tyrants gone, the Mrs and I go out for dinner at the Seafood Factory. She eats 2 dungeoness crabs and I polish off the 20 oz steak with 8 giant breaded shrimp and enough green beans to stun a mid-westerner into a catatonic stupor.

Tuesday: Work-work-work. Remote activities in Spain regarding memory faults ... I may have fixed it, but I'm holding my breath. I have plans to plant more bulbs, go to the Adult Karate class, sand Jake's floor and wash the dogs. Let's see how much of this I actually get done.

Technorati Tags:Santa | Swimming | Karate | Children | Traffic

Labels: Weekend

I've been a bit preoccupied today and thus, did not get to write all the tripe that was fit to print ... or not. So, there is this snippet that my Minnesota Cousin sent me. I've seen it before but it still gives me a chuckle:

DON'T FART IN BED

If this story doesn't make you cry for laughing so hard, let me know and
I'll pray for you.

This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years.

The only friction in there marriage was the husband's habit of farting
loudly every morning when he awoke.

The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water
and make her gasp for air.

Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because
it was making her sick.

He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural.

She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he would
blow his guts out.

The years went by and he continued to rip them out!

Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner
and he was upstairs sound asleep,

she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck,
gizzard, liver and all the spare

parts and a malicious thought came to her.

She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep
and, gently pulling back the bed

covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and
emptied the bowl of turkey guts into

his shorts.

Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting
which was followed by a blood

curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the
bathroom.

The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor
laughing, tears in her eyes! After years

of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good.

About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his blood
stained underpants with a look of

horror on his face.

She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter.

He said, "Honey, you were right.

All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you."

"What do you mean?" asked his wife.

"Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts
out, and today it finally happened.

But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and two fingers, I think I got
most of them back in."

[+/-] show/hide the rest of this post

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Labels: PSA

It's been a bit sluggish over the last few days. Complacency is a terrible thing when consumed in great doses. Of course, there is something to be said for a smooth road. It gives you an opportunity to make small adjustments to your battle plan and you are able to discern any alterations to the outcome, no matter how slight. For instance, we had a new acrylic Microban coated shower insert installed on Monday. The tiles were caving in on the the wall around the faucet so the time was nigh for action. Me, having enough destructive Manor Upgrade programs running in parallel, decided to shell out the three thousand bazillion HED (Haupertonian Empire Dinar) to have someone else do it. They showed up at 0700 and the Mrs monitored them till 1500 when the finished up and left. They did an EXCELLENT job of cleaning up after themselves and the end product, though smelling strongly of RTV, was fantastic. We were not supposed to use it for 24 hours so the kids got a treat of using the Master Suite shower. Jake loves that. We'll have to introduce him to showering more often to save a bit of water. Sure, they swim at night but we do need to wash all the chlorine off. As it stands, the kids hair is starting to get that particular bleached out look that people pay lot's of money for. Funny, they don't even appreciate it. We did get to use the new installation last night though. The color makes the room appear bigger due to the blazing white brightness. Gotta love that. The curved shower curtain rod is another bonus. No more clingy plastic curtain adhering to the wet flesh and chilling you to the bone as you search for the fugitive bar of soap bobbing about your feet. I believe the Mrs is more impressed with this than she would have been with a diamond ring, broach, necklace or earrings. Of course, she does not have pierced ear lobes so I'm low-balling my assertion.

The other event of notice is a biological development. In my never ending quest to staunch my habitual Spoon Deficit Spending Disorder, I've fallen prey to the Government Disease of borrowing from peter to pay paul. Instead of throttling back on my activity level, I'm forging ahead with the goal of obtaining more spoons by hook, crook or raiding the silver wear drawer. Given that presumption, the Mrs (ahh, bewitching, enticing and oh so logical ... my vulcan beauty) saw a bottle of B Complex supplements at the Bulk Warehouse Facility (BJ's) A 55 gallon drum of the buggers. It had enough B6 and B12 to be considered it's own airforce. Ok, that was kinda lame. I was alluding to the B-52 ... not the band mind you ... aw, never mind. I've learned not to tell a bad joke more than once. In any event, I started consuming this additional ORAL horse-pill along with the Volvo sized Evening Primrose capsules, the more friendly E capsules and the traditional multi-vitamin. I thought nothing of it till much later in the day. I did not notice any particular up-tick in my energy levels, but what made me think about it was a misadventure to the Mens room. I drink a lot of coffee. Probably a little too much. You know you have a problem when your urine smells like hot coffee. Now as a man, we have a built in ability to amuse ourselves instead of just crowning the throne. We notice little things while trying to hit the bulls-eye (Really ladies, we do try. We are not peeing on the seat, tank, wall, ceiling and so forth just to get your goat {evil laugh}). So anyways, there I was wizzing away when I notice that the hue of my expelled waste fluids was ... well, not normal. I like asparagus and think it's neat that I can turn something green into something bright yellow. When you don't eat said scrumptious veggie and you notice that the byproduct of your consumption is now neon/acid/fluorescent/typhoid yellow you tend to become slightly uneasy. After my alarm died down, I was sitting in my corner office for a bit before the revelation hit me. It was that damn binding agent in the throat-grinder of a pill that did the dirty deed. It was a relief that I would not have to go to my fantastic female family physician and tell her that 'there is something wrong with my pee-pee!'. I'm sure she is used to that kind of candor, but I'm still a relatively modest guy. Well, mostly in person ... I tend to be quite brazen in the blogosphere. That being said, I'm happy as a brilliant blazing yellow bee about the B-12/6 and that the side effects to date, are more artfully amusing than chemically corrosive .... man, I'm absurdly alliterative today, no?[+/-] show/hide the rest of this post

Technorati Tags:Vitamins | Plumbing

Labels: Banalities

How can you argue against this? With irrationality of course, but still ... You know, I want one.

Whether or not you believe that we're in the midst of an episode of anthropogenic global warming, it seems to me that burning fossil fuels when there are alternatives is obviously a bad idea. Leaving aside greenhouse gases, burning coal and oil releases all sorts of nasty substances into the air, ranging from the obvious -- like hydrocarbons and soot -- to the not-so-obvious, like the surprising amount of radioactivity released into the atmosphere by burning coal.
<...>
Now some environmentalists are beginning to argue that nuclear power is valuable, and maybe even essential if we are to prevent a global environmental catastrophe. One of them is James Lovelock, who argues that the risks of nuclear power are far smaller than the risks from burning coal and oil:

"We live in a nuclear-powered universe. We're the oddballs by getting energy from burning carbon.
"My justification of nuclear power is that we've reached a stage now where the dire things that threaten us are so great that even the results of an all-out nuclear war pale into insignificance as unimportant compared to what's going to happen."

I think -- and hope -- that Lovelock's greenhouse disaster scenario is overly pessimistic.
As a recent survey article in Popular Mechanics magazine makes clear, there are new approaches to nuclear power in the offing that promise cleaner and more efficient power production with far less risk of "all-out" (or even minor) nuclear war in the process. Of these, perhaps the most promising technology is the pebble bed reactor:

"A typical pebble-bed reactor would function somewhat like a giant gumball machine. The design calls for a core filled with about 360,000 of these fuel pebbles -- "kernels" of uranium oxide wrapped in two layers of silicon carbide and one layer of pyrolytic carbon, and embedded in a graphite shell. Each day about 3000 pebbles are removed from the bottom as fuel becomes spent. Fresh pebbles are added to the top, eliminating the need to shut down the reactor for refueling. Helium gas flows through the spaces between the spheres, carrying away the heat of the reacting fuel. This hot gas -- which is inert, so a leak wouldn't be radioactive -- can then be used to spin a turbine to generate electricity, or serve more exotic uses such as produce hydrogen, refine shale oil or desalinate water.

"The pebbles are fireproof and almost impossible to use for weapons production. The spent fuel is easy to transport and store, though there still remains the long-term problem of where to store it. And the design of the nuclear reactor is inherently meltdown-proof. If the fuel gets too hot, it begins absorbing neutrons, shutting down the chain reaction. In 2004, the cooling gas and secondary safety controls were shut off at an experimental pebble-bed reactor in China -- and no calamity followed, says MIT professor Andrew Kadak, who witnessed the test."

China, with a booming economy, a huge population, and air pollution problems that are already absolutely dreadful, is very interested in pebble bed reactors.

A little science and politics to start the day off. Personally, I think we could use one of these in each US city that has a population exceeding 250K. That would make a fairly robust power grid and it would help with these rolling black-outs we now enjoy during the summer months. Or even better, the ones that California was able to enjoy a ways back or the massive failure in the NorthEast. If these could be 'Micro-Sized', it would certainly make distribution of power a bit more rational. But heym that's just little old me wishing upon a star. A fission star.

Technorati Tags:Gas | Environment | Nuclear Power

Labels: PSA

Since the last post was so popular, here is another that does not involve any deep frying. I suppose you could if you really wanted to. Kind of a spring-roll version of this. But without further ado:

SPAM IMPERIAL TORTILLA SANDWICHES

Serving Size : 6
Amount Measure Ingredient -- Preparation Method
-------- ------------ --------------------------------
1 cn SPAM Luncheon Meat (12 oz)
1 pk Cream cheese, softened (8oz)
1/3 c Chopped green onion
2 tb Chopped fresh dill
3 Flour tortillas (8")
1 md Cucumber, peeled and thinly
-sliced
1/4 c Sunflower seeds
1/2 c Alfalfa sprouts

In bowl, combine SPAM and cream cheese. Stir in green onion and dill.
Spread 1/3 of SPAM mixture evenly over each tortilla. Top with 1/3
each cucumber, sunflower seeds, and alfalfa sprouts. Roll up tortilla
jelly roll fashion and wrap in plastic wrap. Repeat with remaining
tortillas. Refrigerate 2 hours. to serve, cut each roll in half.

One thing I noticed here ... no where in the recipie is it mentioned that the spam is to be heated or have any heat at all applied to it. I know it's already cooked, but I just can't get my head around eating cold, ground meats unless there is a sausage involved.

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Labels: PSA

It's that time again. Pull up a chair, unwind and let me assail you with a few of the bright burning lights of the Roman Candle we call the MS Blogosphere. You know, it is so much easier to rifle through the experiences, hopes, dreams and triumphs of others than to try to fabricate your own. Of course, when you get into the electronic peeping-tom habit of living vicariously through the blog-lives of others, it highlights the things in your own life that you may take for granted, or initially thought were really insignificant. For example, Stephen over at One Life (Two Buddahs for the old-timers) is transitioning from ESpace to MeatSpace (not the VideoDrome meatspace, but the act of dealing with people w/o a keyboard as the medium) in his working environment. The life-style change is one very effective way of keeping snapping jaws of MS at bay. One thing my karate instructor told me (after popping me in the mouth with a high-punch) was that the best way not to get hurt is to 'Not be there'. Great advice, wish him luck with his paradigm change.

Once again, Vicki posts some exceedingly good material pointing out Yoga resources. And, of course, along with that particular type of physical exercise, there is the Tai Chi branch that Miss Chris is trying out too. Either way, it's good to keep active. Of course, if you are an utter maniac, you could go for the royal flush (no, not you Linda, honest!) and do the Karate/Tang Soo Do/Tae Kwan Do route. Not for the timid or those with awful balance such as myself. But hey, I'm a bit on the crazy side and there are mats on the floor (and walls ... and doors ... hey, is this an insane asylum!? I'm wearing a white jacket with belts and straps!). Oh, and while we are on the subject of tumbles, it looks like Karyl in Colorado took a bit of a spill and found herself at the mercy of her cats for a good while. Let her challenge be an example of patience and humility for us all. Personally, I'm going to make sure that I try to put on a nice heavy overcoat before letting the hounds out in the evening. I could find myself at the mercy of the circling buzzards should the Mrs not wake for a few hours while I bide my time in the back-50. I'm sure the Cybernetic Hounds would tend to me for that time but I'm not up for testing the 'Three Dog Night' sleeping arrangement.

And on to new business. Through my internet browser travels, I've come across a few blogs (new to me) that could use a spotlight. First off, Michael posted his url at Karyl's and he is dealing with the unpleasant cruft that comes with being a recently diagnosed MS sufferer. Sometimes, the people that you need the most cannot help you. Also, sorting through all the treatment options can be quite unpleasant and sometimes just plain dangerous. He's fairly young, active and, like many of us, just starting out in his new life. Now the next two I've gleaned from both BrainCheese and Jamie's blogs. PJ, who is a prolific commenter at BrainCheese's place just opened up shop at an 'over 50' community. You can sign up to comment, but you will need to lie about your age. I went from 38 to 50 in just a few seconds. Ugh. She just put up a very interesting post about silver wear, dogs, and compromising positions. Then there is Wendy who was just diagnosed about a week ago. Let her know that it's a beginning and not an end. For me, and I say this honestly, I believe that MS actually made me a better person. No, really. It FORCED me to re-evaluate what was important in my life and what I should not be taking for granted. Life is hard sometimes, but all suffering is not necessarily bad. Let's just hope that any suffering we are all subject to will be amply rewarded by the choices we are required to make. Sorry for the somber tone, but you just cannot joke about everything all the time. Mostly. Aw hell, who am I kidding. Remember folks, when you take a tumble or find yourself wedged in a dish-washer, just laugh heartily. For if you don't someone else will! Probably in the comment section.

Crossposted from Charles's site as a service to mankind!

Technorati Tags:Multiple Sclerosis | Heros

Labels: Heros, Multiple Sclerosis

Quick recap of the weekend, including Friday. There were a whole raft of accidents this weekend. The first one was on the way to work in the morning. It had somehow come about 180 degrees and was blocking one lane in the west bound traffic. Just that car. The police had not arrived yet so the blinking , flashing pretty-pretty lights had not seduced the rubber neckers as of yet. The one in the afternoon included a school bus. The Buick (why is it always a Buick!?) was pretty much demolished. The bus hit it right on the side at a pretty good clip. This was about 1615 in the afternoon so I assume that there were no children on board. Still, I was gripping the rosary quite tightly till I passed it. There were several news helicopters circling like the buzzards they are and the Tyrants were out in the exercise yard watching them. If it is a transport vehicle, Jake loves it. Either that, or they were contemplating their own version of a mechanized calvary. We headed off to swimming which was in the other direction. Of course, this is just past where we saw an accident Thursday night. Sand was still thick in the intersection. After swimming, we TRIED to go to karate only to find that the closure of the road where the bus had plowed the car (which, by the way was obviously in the wrong) had forced massive overflow traffic onto my alternate route. Took us 30 minutes to get to Karate. Not fun. Peculiar thing about this is that I was talking to a school bus driver the other night. Her child is a black-belt at the same school and she happens to know 'Family Friend Pete'. Anyways, she was saying that the one turn I take to get to work goes past the base and the bus depot and there seems to be an accident THERE every week. I have yet to see one though. Everywhere but there. Fates, they are wicked in intention.

Saturday, it's a slow day. I had a dentist appointment at 0800 which got me out and about quite early. Since I was in the area, I also got one of my quarterly buzz-jobs at the Air-base barber shop. I did not have to wait long, just two personnel from the base there ahead of me ... it was a very opportune time to show up. Spent the rest of the day messing about with the kids and then accepted a lunch invite from Gus and Irene from across the street. The Tyrants adore them. I think that Gus and Irene really enjoy the attention too. I spoke to Gus for quite a bit about various topics of the day and we all had a fairly good time. While there, we were waited upon by a wisp of a girl by the name of Dawn. Nice enough young lady ... Jake was enamored enough to work some of his charms on her too. Apparently, she saw some of her own family in our gathering. The Mrs told me that the girl is half Chinese and half German/Hungarian who's father was apparently a military man. My recent haircut and how much Alexis reminded her of her younger self was striking enough to get her to reveal all these details to the Mrs. Strange, we seem to run into the nicest people at Bartuccis. Must be the residual psychic energy from when I proposed to the Mrs in that very restaurant nearly 12.5 years ago now. Sunday: Well, it's Sunday School, of course. Then shopping at Wegmans and BJ's. The Mrs insisted that she come along this time so we don't need to take out a home equity loan to pay for the groceries. I tend to get carried away when shopping for food. I guess it would help if I ate something before going out. But than again, where is the fun in that!

We had a party to attend for on of the Tyrants' Subjects/ClassMates later in the afternoon. It was at a local Chuck-E-Cheese duplicate establishment about 200 meters from where the DayCare/ReEducation/Interment Center is located. I was very surprised about this place. I've driven past it multiple times and only gave it a passing thought. They had limited coin games (good, I hate them things) but the ball-pit and jungle gym was pretty good ... and they had a moon-bounce which occupied the kids for a good while. They also have batting cages and such for the older kids so I think we may be coming back for more visits. The Mrs and I even talked about having the Tyrant's 5th birthday party there. Close to us and it's in a place that all their classmates are familiar with.

The last chunk of the day was dedicated to home improvement. The Mrs and I finish the wall paper in the master suite. It looks pretty good if I do say so myself. I just need to put up the molding and the chair rail and we'll be pretty much done. Then I can focus on Jake's room. I can be such a slacker about these things. Perhaps I should get down to it tonight. We'll see.

[+/-] show/hide the rest of this post

Technorati Tags:Traffic | Swimming | Karate | Children | Haircut

Labels: Weekend

This could save your life ... or end it.

Title: Coconut Beer Batter Spam with Raspberry Horseradish Sauce
Categories: Meats, Condiments
Yield: 4 Servings

2 3/4 c Flour
2 tb Oil
2 Eggs
3/4 c Cold water
2 c Beer, flat
3/4 ts Salt
Dash pepper
1 1/2 ts Garlic powder
12 oz (1 can) Spam or Spam Lite
2 c Shredded coconut
RASPBERRY SAUCE:
1 c Raspberry sauce or jelly
3 tb Horseradish sauce

Open beer and leave at room temperature over night.[ed. ick, already]

Chill beer and then add water, oil and eggs. Mix just
enough to break the egg yokes. In separate bowl, mix
flour, salt, pepper and garlic powder. Add to liquid
ingredients, while stirring slowly. Add coconut and
stir slowly.

Prepare deep fryer as directed by manufacturer. When
oil is ready, dip one inch wide strips of Spam in beer
batter and deep fry until they float to the surface.[ed. much like the cholesterol in your bloodstream]

To make raspberry sauce, combine raspberry syrup or
jelly with horseradish sauce in small bowl.

Dip in raspberry sauce and enjoy.[ed. yesss, enjoy your last meal, foolish mortal ]

FROM: 1996 Alaska State Fair Winner National Best Spam
Recipe Contest by Donna Affinito of Palmer, Alaska

You know, it does sound awfully ... ummm ... awful ... tasty? I wonder if you could substitute scrapple in. Gak.

Technorati Tags:Spam | Health | Food

Labels: PSA

Okay, zip happened over the course of the last 24 hours. Nothing out of the ordinary ... not even a profound or semi-interesting thought. Well, I did hear a quip about 'Even if it will be wiped away, build it anyways'. Poignant, but not very original ... like that has ever stopped me before. I suppose I'm just being a bit recidivist today. My head, toe, ankle and shoulder are all a bit 'ouchie' today, causing me to languish in a puddle of self-pity and meaningless melancholy. I mean, jeeze. It's sunny out, not very cold at all (its damn near 60 here) meaning that I still don't have to turn on the heat yet ... saving money on the utility bill for the Mrs. Must be that silly seasonal light deficiency disorder syndrome thingie. Naw, I'm not buying it. I'm a programmer and as a mushroom, I flourish in the dark, damp dungeons of memory addresses and obscure dereferenced pointers. I think I know what it is. Things have been so good in my personal life of late, I'm expecting the 'Vengeance of the Universe' to befall me. Hmph, at least my plumbing isn't blowing septic all over the manor and the electric did not cut out after all that rain. Either I've been in a pit so long I don't know what normal life is like or I'm a hopeless curmudgeon. I'll bet a bottle of shiraz tonight will aptly apply an attitude change. I'll bet it'll help me with my agility and dexterity issues too, ya think? :)

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Labels: Banalities

With this week, I think I'll get started by focusing on an AUSLANDER community and some general information blogs. At the top of the list is a LiveJournal community that has so many contributors it can safely go up against the Moonies or Latter Day Saints in the membership rolls. You will need an LJ account to comment, but they are free so go right ahead and register. Just be aware though that some of these folks are a bit rough around the edges so don't get turned off if you find that some of their blogs are 'For Friends Only'. A lot of recent Diagnosed MS folk travel through there..

Two other treasure troves of opinion and data that I've run across are Vicki who just posted about Disabled Skiing trips. You know, it has been a long time since I competed or even strapped any waxed slats to my feet but I might get motivated enough this year to give it a crack. At least I could show the Twin Tyrants of Turpitude that I'm just as good as they are at SOMETHING. Vicki also posts a lot of other information so make sure to visit her at least once a day. You never know what she might unearth.

My other breakthrough blog is a site by a fellow named Stu. I found out about him via Lauren's blog who is also a big Tysabri Proponent. She is making an excellent comeback into the world of 'Highly Mobile MSer'. Wish her luck with her progress. But back to Stu's World ... he has a few tips up for us folk that could probably be taken to heart by anyone. For such common sense things it's unfathomable why we can be so damn hard-headed about it. Take a gander at what he has, but his comments are closed for now so bide your time and say Howww-Deee! later.

On to Heather, who is having a bit of a rough time with her shots. She is getting better, but could use some real-life success stories to keep her hopes high. The rough times with the drugs are the windows in which we usually give up hope and fall off the wagon. I'm sure a little encouragement would go a long ways. Keep it up Heather, I want to run against you in the NY Marathon some day. Charles will be there to cheer us on for sure.

Mmmm, a bit more time for some of our snow-bound brethren. AK-45 Michelle is back from San Fransisco and is announcing that home is where the heart is. Looks like Alaska is a just as good of a place to be a 'Bike Bum' as the more temperate locales of central CA. Her flight was a bit rough on the courage front, but she made it back to the land of ice and snow in good spirits. Speaking of Golden Sun and Snow ... Sherry is making Lemon Snow Cones with her Golden Retriever for anyone who is interested. No? That's ok, she'll make more for you when you change your mind. And with that, I'll sign off and trundle off in the flash-flood rain of a Pennsyltucky fall. I'd wish for snow, but all you western folk stole it all.

Crossposted from Charles's site as a service to mankind!

Technorati Tags:Multiple Sclerosis | Heros

Labels: Heros, Multiple Sclerosis

Mkay, this is going to be quick. No goofy nonsense. Just the facts Mam'. Things like taking my kids to vote at 0700 yesterday will, of course, have to be elaborated on. We were there a few minutes before the polls opened so we got to wait in the cold for about 5 or 10 min. I did not pay much attention to the ballots, but I'm fairly sure we have the electronic (paperless) variety. Alexis picked who would be her future Reps/Senators so she knew who to overthrow and Jake hit the submit button. Practice for that big red button in the oval office. Would you like to play a game? Boom. It was a good lesson about civics for them. In the end, I told them that this was how we picked who was going to be our police, firemen and tax collectors. If you think about it for a few minutes, it's actually true.

Later on in the day, we got in contact with our plumber, Fred. Good guy. Even if he votes on the other side of the ballot. We had a talk about that and we pretty much fish in the same stream with our principles ... He is just upset that he cannot vote in the Republican Primary as well as the Democrat one. I did not have the heart to tell him that it is like voting for the President of the Kiwanis Society when you are a member of the Free Masons. You gotta be in the club and you can only pick one. Aside from politics, he figured out why the hot water was cutting out on various access points throughout the Manor. The 'Dip Tube' (no joke, that's the name of it) was corroding in the hot water heater and the bits were being picked up and clogging the faucet filters. Cold water will be ok, but the hot water heater will need to be replaced some time soon. As the tube breaks down and disintegrates, we will have more of these issues as well as diminishing efficiency of the heater. Good thing I did not opt for the HVAC replacement this year. Maybe I should get one of those smaller, on demand type tanks. Or even, a tankless one! Hmmm, even less gas use ... more savings, better for the environment? Or even, a solar water heater. No, you know what, I think I'll stick with my hydrocarbon based unit but look into a more efficient reality based installation.

After the bad news from the plumber (piping and politics), I did the evening drill of swimming/tsd with the Tyrants and then abandoned them at the end of class so I could go see the Dermatoligist. The Mrs, being ever observant, thought that some of the moles on my back need to be investigated. I guess after 10 years, she is starting to get attached to me and wants me to stick around for a while. With all the bad news being delivered on this melancholy Tuesday, I thought I would be tempting fate by asking if I had any cancer spots. I lucked out. The Dr said I had wonderful, well shaped moles and not very many of them. Just a lot of sun freckles on my shoulders. And for those two nasty and quite annoying warts on the soles of my feet ... a prescription of hot acid magma to burn them out. Fun. About as fun as the awful morning rain. Fall in SouthEast Pennsyltucky ... it's like draining an infected cyst without all the fun.[+/-] show/hide the rest of this post

Technorati Tags:Vote | Swimming | Karate | Children | Plumbing

Labels: Banalities

# posted by mdmhvonpa @ 8:20 AM  |

Last Thursday was the date of my previous dissertation. I've fallen behind ... sorry. Well, in my defense, I've finally been fully welcomed into the fold at work and introduced to a new task ... core dumps in Spain. This should be different. That's all I'll say about that ... 'The segmentation fault in Spain falls mainly in the malloc-memset'. But enough about me, let's catch up on the going's on in the Haupertonian Manor and our quest for total world domination. Thursday night at the Swim club granted me another illegally parked vehicle in the Ramp Access ... and this time I have a pretty good idea that it was a woman ... her purse was still in the seat. Not too bright since I could plainly see that the doors were unlocked. She even left the flashers on to indicate that she would not be long. Good for anyone needing to use the ramp for it's actual purpose. You know, so they can squeeze down the remaining space and leave a 10 foot scratch along the side. Yeah, temptation is horrible. The kids enjoyed swimming since they did not have any lessons. They took some advice from me, we did a few laps and then engaged in horse-play for the rest of the evening. Steph the lifeguard was there so she got in the pool and goofed off with the Tyrants for a bit. They nearly dunked her twice, but were a bit more tender with her than me.

The morning traffic was a blast though. A little accident a few meters up the road for from the previous one made east bound traffic a mess in the morning. Good for me that I was proceeding to the west. I'm still making good time though. My worst time is about 22 minutes. I can live with it. The evening rush hour is a bit easier though ... must be my 1600 hour departure time. I asked the Mrs to come on over to Karate because I believed that Alexis may get her 1st stripe ... but alas, she got stage fright and was unable to perform. Such is the fickle winds that blow from the petulant lips of fate ... she must be a real kill-joy at parties. One interesting thing about that ... the instructor informed me that I was scheduled to come in on Saturday morning for a test. Say what wha? A test? Oh, ok ... sure.

Long story short, I show up at friggen 930AM for what I thought would be a simple examination of the 3 forms that I knew ... at noon, I crawl out of the building with a crisp new yellow belt. HOLY CRAP THAT WAS HARD! I don't think I had worked out that hard in YEARS. Sure, I swim for an hour every night and do TSD for another hour ... but having to go for 2 hours of straight calisthenics and such was a shock to the system. The pain and soreness did not really settle in till late Sunday. Ah, yes Sunday. I did not do much on Saturday afternoon. Gas up the Super Saturn at $2.07/gal USD, pick up 2 weeks worth of dog-dip in the back yard (with the mrs ... we have the best dates) and mow the back 50 to get all the leaves up. Sunday, well, I went to church/Sunday-school with the kids .. then went shopping with the Mrs and Tyrants at our new Wegmans. That was it. Even that little was nearly beyond my means. I had planned to mow the front yard, but was unable to muster enough moxie to actually get the mower started. I was pathetic as a lame kitten. Not that the Tyrants took much notice of my incapacity. Nope, no mercy for the downtrodden.

Monday: Hunt down memory leaks at work, go swimming, go to TSD practice. One thing I did notice is the dribble of hot water that was coming out of the spigot in the Tyrant's Royal Bathtub fixture. Something is blocking the water and I'm guessing it's some calcium that has broken loose from within the pipes. I'll have to get our plumber to come in and remedy the situation before next Monday. That's the date when we get our tub/shower liner installed and after that, all bets are off. We did have Fred install the Mowen faucet in that tub to start with so he should have no problem. I hope. The Mrs and I are using that shower so having a moderate amount of water pressure would be nice ... so we could share. As it stands, we only have a broadcast spray angle of about 2 inches. By the time this morning came around, the pressure only dropped ... all the other spigots and faucets in the Manor are at normal velocity so I know this will probably involve a torch and some copper. Fun times.

Technorati Tags:Gas | Swimming | Karate | Children | Plumbing

Labels: Weekend

We are back on schedule now that the night of the living candy zombies is over. Since Wednesday is the off night, we only go swimming with a 45 minute swim lesson starting at 1745. Of course, this is the level 3 swim course and I'm thinking that it may very well be the LAST swim lesson that the kids will be enrolled in. Alexis is all of a slender 30 odd pounds and they are now required to swim in the lap pool. They are being taught proper technique for the different strokes and how to breath properly for the 'front crawl'. Okay, that pool is full of ice bergs and is kept that way for the larger adults who go full tilt. Do you know how much you sweat when you swim? Well, for Alexis and Jake to keep their core temps above cryogenic hibernation levels, they would have to be going full tilt too. Not happening. So with her teeth chattering and quivering blue lips, she crawled out of the pool and did her passive resistance act. No response to requests, no action taken in face of hostile forces. Just wrapped up in a towel and squatted at the edge of the pool in solitary repose. Jake was not doing any better, but he has daddy's antifreeze for blood and only noticed the cold when he saw his sky blue sister. Even the instructor was shivering. You know, I'm not expecting the Tyrants to beat Mark Spitz's records by the time they hit 1st grade. They understand the strokes, they just need practice and frankly, they need to enjoy it. This was not enjoyable.

To frustrate me even more, some jackass in a Buick had parked their land yacht right up against the wall where the handicap ramp is at the front door. Why do these fickle twits think that it is a parking spot. The car in question has no plates or tags to indicate it. Who are these 'people' and why are their heads made of cinder blocks!? So, the Tyrants and I have to walk into the traffic lane to get around the illegally parked vehicle to get to the SuperSaturn. One more incident like this and I'm going to start carrying around some RDX/C-4 to clear out these vermin. That, or some strongly worded notices (the UN way of doing things) with threats of more strongly worded condemnations. I wonder if North Korea is willing to sell some small tactical nukes to me.

Speaking of oblivious actions, There was an accident on the way to work this morning. Looks like someone was changing lanes in the middle of an intersection and ran someone into a phone pole who was making a right hand turn into the 2 lanes of traffic. Both people are at fault there if my assumption is correct. This is why I never turn right on red if I can see traffic coming. You are not supposed to change lanes in intersections, but it happens all too frequently for my comfort. Nope, call me Nervous Nelly, but I don't need that kind of excitement in my life. Yeah, I think tracking gasoline prices is heart-racing ... my Mrs will never need to worry about me burning the candle at both ends.[+/-] show/hide the rest of this post

Technorati Tags:Swimming | Karate | Children

Labels: Banalities

# posted by mdmhvonpa @ 3:51 PM  |

Well, here you have it. A weekly MS Gossip Roundup of all the ups and downs of our fellow MS Cadre in the Blogosphere. Now I know there are a lot of other folks out there with lots going on in their lives so I'm just going down a list and picking up some of the most recent/vocal/prolific blabber-mouths. And yes, I know every time I point a finger there are four pointing right back at me.

First off, let's drop in on PB at The Multiple Sclerosis Companion. She just married off her daughter in a wedding where nothing, absolutely NOTHING went ... wrong. Well, throw me in a skirt and call me Sally. If the big things can go as planned, there is yet hope for all of us.

Dave, at ms not just a diary is doing his best to fend off neighbors of dubious intent and reasserting his desire to be a hermit. That aside, I've never seen someone with so much to say. The blog-mister runs a handful of active literary outlets all while managing to entertain and keep his romantic interests queued up. In spite if what his kin may say, I really do not think he is gay. A bit jolly perhaps ... but the verdict is not out yet.

Pam out of the hinterlands re-emerges with a cautionary tale of woe regarding the 'flu time of the year'. If you are susceptible to UR infections, do not play tough-guy. Myself and Miss Chris can attest that the tougher you are, the harder you fall. And Ohhh boy, what a fall it can be. Need I show you my bruised ankle? But enough of the foot fetish nonsense, I left a link in the comment section at Pam's joint that you really should follow! Also, a linkless community site I've been visiting has some interesting questions regarding this topic. Travis posts 3 times a week and usually has something meaty to chew on. Did I mention he used to be a chef?

A good friend and lovingly maternal mother, Patricia, is contending with a bit of grief right now. Seems to be going around. She put up a wonderful eulogy for her departed friend. Go on over and get the whole gestalt of her post. Leave a comment, support helps.

In the mean-time, a few of the 'AWOL' blogger have popped back up. One of my secret ninja posters is Sister Jane. She shoots from the hip and takes no sass. That said, she is moving on over to the East Cost soon to show us flat-landers just what it means to be from the Fly-Over states. Maryland will never be the same. And unfortunately for Montana, neither will the West. If you are near Gaithersburg, keep an eye out for her and give her a hearty welcome.

Speaking of hearty ... wait ... did I mean 'farty?' Anyways, Linda is back from swabbing the decks with her male counterparts. She is just as cheesy as ever and is soliciting other ms/support folk for some crafty material. She just put up a pretty lengthy post on Halloween History for all you who care to look beyond the commercial factor. Me? More snicker's bars please ... hold the sweet-tarts.

Hmmm, what else ... oh, yes. Some good news and bad news. Friday's Child is professing her love by announcing her 9th anniversary of wedded bliss to Mr Man. No illness, no loss, no hurricane nor dusty ceiling fan can break that bond. They are about to move back into their place down there in NO so if you feel the urge, give her some verbal house-warming gifts. The bad news ... JodyV is closing up shop. Sorry to see you go Mam, you were one of my first links. Wish her well in her future endeavors or beg her to stay.

What? You still here? You want more of this? Huh? Well then, Shoester is railing against the HMO/pharmacy machine. Doug, that name ... as a lawyer, it seems a bit suspicious! As one curmudgeon to another, I hope you get what you need for the pain management. Nothing like a grouchy MS sufferer not getting enough sleep. I think the only thing worse is probably a wife of a grouchy MS sufferer also not getting enough sleep. I am now patiently waiting for the transcendental whack from the Mrs ... OW!

MC-Jamie is ripping it up and going out on the RF to sell that CD. She is one motivated lady. Just goes to show you that there are every-day heroes (heroines?) out there. You don't need to drive a race-car, run a marathon or climb mountains to be an inspiration.

Crossposted from Charles's site as a service to mankind!

Technorati Tags:Multiple Sclerosis | Heros

Labels: Multiple Sclerosis

Well, that was fun. There was no swimming or karate for the kids last night. Instead, we played on the mile-long driveway till the sun went down and the spooks came out. Jake was 'Thomas the Tank Engine' again this year. I have no problem with that. We paid a billion dollars for that flimsy sheet of colored foam, might as well get as much use out of it as possible. Alexis went as Sleeping Beauty. I alway find that odd though. Her outfit is actually some play clothing she was given by either my Big Little Brother or one of the Fawning Grandparents. Either way, it was available and easy to ensconce her within. One of these years, I'll convince her to go as Wednesday Adams. I don't think Jake would make a good Pugsly so the whole lot of us going out as a theater troupe will probably not do. Not sure who could possibly be Lurch.

The Mrs and the Tyrants go out to spread havoc about the surrounding countryside as I stay at the Manor and take pot-shots at passing hordes of begging urchins. It's ok, I'm only using black-powder and jaw-breakers as shot. In spite of my best efforts, about a score of costumed miscreants made it all the way to the front portcullis. Now I need to figure out what I'm going to do with 20 bushels of candy we have left over. We are smart enough to get hard candy so we cannot be tempted to eat the whole lot. We should be able to dispose of it by next Halloween. A dozen reloads and a few hours later, the Mrs returns with the exhausted ones in tow. They apparently enjoyed the pillaging and burning of villages and had a great quantity of booty to show for it. Along the way, one of the local police SUV cruisers stopped them. The officer was a female and she had no defense against Jake's charms so ended up handing over her goodies and phone-number for him. Later on, the kids encountered a hovel where the occupant was dressed in the outfit shown in the movie 'Scream'. Apparently, Alexis almost called it quits right then and there. She is not entirely kosher with surprises of that nature. The man was lucky she did not demonstrate her strong survival skills. Next time, she may just call in a close air strike - fire on this position for full effect. That, or "Nuke 'em from orbit, it's the only way to be sure.". It would occur to me that it would be something she would say ... and do. I wonder if she will name the 1st Orbital Combat Platform after me. Heh, the HSS Mdmhvonpa. But I digress ... Jake, when seeing this apparition, was unfazed and remarked that "I'm a man and I not scared!'. Well then! A bit of confidence and a stiff upper lip will get you pretty far, my boy. Just make sure to have the 'Big Stick' to follow through. That, or have a sister willing and able to cudgel your opponents into submission.

Speaking of blunt force trauma ... I was listening to public radio the other day. Yeah, it hurts. Anyways, they were reporting that there is a massive food poisoning incident occurring in South Carolina and Pennsylvania. Hundreds of reported cases with scores being hospitalized. Nice! I'll wager there were thousands like myself and the Mrs who did not report it. Apparently, the source is unknown, the consumables affected could not be determined and the was no specific grocery or restaurant known to be the distribution point. WTF! For all we know, it could be the water. Disease control, if done properly, is a good thing. If we cannot handle another outbreak of contaminated food (green onions, spinnach), how are we going to deal with H5N1 or SARS!? ARGH! With that, here are some pics from the Fall-Season-Candy-Day outings:






BTW: Notice all the green we still have here in Pennsyltucky? Where is all the snow? HAH! East Coast Rulz, West coast is snow-bound.

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Technorati Tags:Holloween | Children | Candy | Illness

Labels: Children, Halloween