White Lightning Axiom: Redux: January 2007

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

 

Fatty-fatty 2x4 ...

hp
Sadly enough, I have one item ... a nagging little tick burrowing deep within my flaccid midsection ... to discuss today. The other day I was thinking to myself that I should go check my wight on the bathroom scale and see what these past few months of heavy exertion have done for me. An hour of swimming with the kids ... and hour of TSD with the kids every week day and then another 90 minutes of Adult TSD three times a week. With my all fruit/veggie diet for breakfast/lunch during the week I would be nothing but lean, sinew and taught muscle. Nope, the numbers stabbing back at my ego blew me away. 205. Say what-WHA!? How? How in God's green earth (brown, if you live in Pennsyltucky) did I GAIN 10 pounds? It must be some genetic survival trait I've harbored in my Minnesota Midsection till this day when upon nearing my 39th birthday, it has suddenly switched on. Hmmm ... I certainly hope I am not doomed to gain 39lb! I think I must finally admit that my absurd hyper metabolism is really slowing down and my days of wolfing down 28 oz steaks on the weekends should probably come to a close. That, or I should stop raiding the Tyrants Halloween candy surplus. Getting at it is no mean feat, mind you. Laser beam triggers, pressure plates, giant rolling stone ball, spike filled pits with cyborg snakes. The Mrs has a similar setup to guard her chips, but I get though anyways. Determined am I. Then again, if I did some seated aerobic exercise while mouldering away at the keyboard all day, like some deranged medieval monk, I suppose I could slough off a few pounds. You know, now that I think about it, there is that pizza night we have on Thursdays ... and the lo-meign night on Wednesdays ... and the carb-loading pasta-rific meals the rest of the week. Hmmmm. That, and I've been negligent about chopping some of the remaining wood. Perhaps I should talk to Tyra Banks about this.



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Monday, January 29, 2007

 

Weekend 20070127-29

snow
Here I am, cranking up the 'Way-Back-Machine' once again. Searching and scraping the bottom of my long term memory for a hint as to what the heck happened to the last 48 hours. For the most part, it was the same-old same-old. Other than it got stinking cold ... finally. The wood stove could not keep up and I actually had to turn on the furnace to get everything to a reasonable temperature above 0 Kalvin. Oh, that does remind me of one little thing. We had a power outage on Friday night due to some digging at the new Citgo gas station on the corner. I'm sure Hugo Chavez had something to do with it. He is waging a proxy war against the Haupertonian Empire by enlisting thuggish and pestiferous minions to launch harassment attacks against our supply lines. No matter, the power was back on within an hour or so, but we still had to go through all 100 levels of the complex and reset each of the damn clocks. All this after I had dropped off the POS SuperSaturn at the Mechanic's for inspection and any repairs to pass said inspection. Urgh. I ended up shelling out 400$ for new engine mounts. One was cracked, the other was gone. That explains the horrible shaking I've endured for the last few months. And here I thought I was just having tremors!

Saturday was a non-event. Laundry, messing about with the kids, etc. Sunday is usually when the rubber hits the road. That last desperate attempt to conflate all our efforts and accomplish something before sliding into the weekday morass of daily grindage. I woke up bright eyed and bushy-tailed to greet the day as another wonder of God's grace. Yeah, right. I was stuffed up with about 25 gallons of snot and felt about as bright-eyed as a blind cave fish. My physical ailments aside, I knew that I needed to get my but in gear so I could get the Tyrants to Sunday School ... And myself as well. If you arrive too late, parking spots are not available. Everyone likes to park around the perimeter so they can leave early and not get blocked in. This does, of course, lock-out anyone wanting to park inside where there are empty spots. Yes, even in God's house, people can be extraordinarily selfish. We used to have a 'parking lot militia', but it is a thankless job and there is no enforcement power ... just guilt. That (as a catholic) is usually more than enough of a hammer. But I digress. The reason I brought up Sunday School is that while out getting gasoline for the POS Saturn (once every 2 weeks, 11 gallons), I heard my name called out while pumping gasoline. Turn around and there is one of the mothers who's child (Nichole ... no, not really, protecting the innocent) is in the class. She waved hi and we spouted some non-sense about the weather. Hey, I'm getting famous! Children and their parents point and shout: 'Hey! There goes Mr. MdmhVonPA. Hi!' Yep, famous. And not in a overweening or presumptuous sort of way. No nekkid home videos, embarrassing paparazzi moments or Talk TV Cat Fights. It's nice to finally find my place in the grand scheme of things. With that said, while the Mrs was out shopping with Jovial Jake (It's the only time he is really well behaved ... My son, the shopping dive; GHAAA!) I took Alert Alexis out to the Wine & Liquor store. Our local PLBC franchise which has been allowed to break the mold and stay open on Sundays! HEATHENS! You will burn in that devil's juice you slurp up! Heh. Yeah. She enjoyed being a sybarite in training and helping me pick out the 'Best Wines'. These so happened to be the little 4 pack bottles with twist off caps. Needless to say, they sort-of disappeared from the cart before we checked out. The rest of Sunday was taken up by the weekly 'Doggie Dip Date' for the Mrs and I and the rare event of taking the Tyrants out while big, fluffy snow flakes were falling. We taught them the exquisite and complex art of catching snow-flakes on your tongue. Sorry, no photos of that. Just memories that will go with me to the grave.



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Friday, January 26, 2007

 

Empty Tank

ice
Yeah ... I've slacked again. There has been very little noteworthy events to blog about really. And no, I did not watch the State of the Union. People are going to hear what they want to and minds have been made up about these matters well in advance. So, other than that, it's been the standard Pennsyltucky melancholy winter. Sucking the life out of me like some enormous juice box in the cold withered grip of old man winter. Yeah, it got cold here recently which pretty much spells out the doom the flowers are facing. It hit 15F last night. I wouldn't mind so much but it does get chilly enough in the house to prompt the Inscrutable Alexis to stop by for a visit after her early-morning potty break. Good Thing: she is not wetting her bed; Bad Thing: she uses my head as a dive platform to spelunk beneath the covers and then purees my kidneys with her tiny stainless steel knee caps. Heap the double whammy of 2 seperate viral attacks (1 kind from Jacob, a second variety from Alexis) and I'm fairly miserable. The Tyrants are busy being cute these days in order to dissimulate the obvious, they are two of the 4 horsemen. I'm thinking that we are in store for twins in the future just to collect the whole set. I can see my future social engagements now ... This is my Wife, Mrs Mdmhvonpa and here come the kids; War, Famine, Pestilence and of course, little Death over there peeing liquid fire into the punch bowl. Ain't they sweet?

One thing of interest, due to the record temperatures of late, gas prices are going down. Though, Evil Citgo seems to be in the business of undercutting it's competitors. Poor Hugo is probably hurting for cash now that he has wrecked his economy and poured 20% of the GNP into purchasing new weapon systems. I wont sacrifice the long view for short term gain here. Nope, it's Wawa gas for me at one cent/gallon more. One thin dime.



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Wednesday, January 24, 2007

 

I punch like a sissy-girl.

hp
That's pretty much the totality of my TSD experience last night. Master smith said to me that I keep doing ballerina forms, I should post in my blog that my punches are all show and no substance. Of course, after an hour of swimming and an hour of 'kiddie karate', I tend to get a bit worn down. No excuses, I'll just need to turn the intensity up a notch. I cannot lean on my crutch forever and that being said, having a couple of gams fabricated of uncooked spaghetti and jointed with balls of leaded crystal really is no explanation for not setting the air on fire with the guns I've got hanging from my shoulders. A summer of splitting red-woods with Paul Bunyan's oft neglected splitting maul have left me with a bit more trapezius, bicep and tricep than needed. Not very helpful with the push-ups either since my pectorals have been completely disregarded and contribute nothing to my shock-wave producing punch ... in my mind.

Recently, my new employer has had layoffs announced. Turns out, it's mostly to consolidate since there are satellite offices all over the place. IT costs and facility support expenses were getting a bit onerous. There was an emergency meeting this morning to let us know that the division we are in will not be affected since we now hold the 'Goose who lays golden eggs' title. Funny thing about all this ... on my way into work this morning I was annoyed by the number of people failing to do little things like signal, stop at stop signs, yield right of way, etc .. . because they were much too busy yapping away on their NOT HANDLESS cell phones. This is on the way to work. The company who has a division that makes phones ... that people misuse ... and annoy me on my way to work. Hrmmmm....

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Spam Attack

I have not done this in a bit so I thought I would spice up the week with this tasty little bit of sybarite indulgence.

SPICY SPAM KABOBS

Recipe By :
Serving Size : 4 Preparation Time :0:00
Categories : Main dish Meats

Amount Measure Ingredient -- Preparation Method
-------- ------------ --------------------------------
1/4 c Lemon juice
3 tb Minced onion
1 tb Olive oil
1 t Dried leaf thyme
1 Garlic clove, minced
1/2 t Whole oregano leaves
1/4 t Red pepper flakes
16 Pea pods
1 cn Pineapple chunks packed in light juice, drained (8 oz)
1 cn SPAM Luncheon Meat, cut into 24 cubes (12 oz)
1 Red bell pepper, cut into 1" pieces
4 c Hot cooked rice

Combine first 7 ingredients in 9x12" dish. Wrap pea pods around pineapple chunks. Alternately thread SPAM cubes, pineapple chunks, and bell pepper pieces on eight skewers. Place in dish with marinade. Cover and marinade 2 hours, turning occasionally. Grill kabobs over medium-hot coals 10 minutes, turning occasionally. Or, broil 5" from heat source 8-10 minutes, turning occasionally. Serve with hot cooked rice.
It kinda reminds me of Hawaiian pizza.



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Roundup 20070124

I'm back in black and ready to do a bit of catchup ... or mustard ... in the field. There has been quite a bit of activity out there amongst the faithful and if you inspect the left bar, you'll find a few new faces (URLs) in there. Lets do a bit of meet and greet with our compatriots in the Great MS Battle.

First off, lets see who is new (to me and you). I'm going to do this alphabetical so as to not incur the wrath from the wrongly attributed of low ranking. At the top is Crippled Monkey (aka Damon Rose). This is a professional blogging endeavour (like that ... the extra 'u'?) supported by the BBC. This is mostly a mish-mash of disability news with a healthy helping of the European view. I'm thinking this is something Dave could possibly get involved with.

Next, we have Dissonance (Shannon) who also likes the Dresden Dolls. Drop in and peek about. She is not the most prolific writer, but there is plenty of well crafted posit postings to chew on.

Homer, who has already replied to one of my standard comment quips, is a kindred soul who has battled MS for what seems like an eternity ... or 10 years depending on how you look at that sort of thing. He has a lot of homeopathic ideas to consider so take your time while going over what is offered. I find that his path is similar to mine in a preponderance of ways.

Me&Mine has much to say and the literary force to do it. It's good to see someone with both the background and where-with-all (and probably no need of a spell checker) to get up and start blogging. I'll certainly be going back again to partake of her offerings.

Finally, YodaMamma (I'm sure there's a story behind that) is an adherent to bee sting venom therapy! I'm fairly excited to have finally found someone with first-hand experience with this. Of course, my own interaction with stinging insects has been less than acceptable. I still shudder at the memory of getting a hornet caught in my throat after swallowing down a drink of canned ice tea on that hot summer's day. Not quite the treatment either party had in mind, I'm certain.

Now for the risen dead; those who have come back from OTL status (Out To Lunch). At the top of my list is Stephen at One Life. He's back and still trying to make that work transition that will make for a less stressful life. I'm not going to steal all the thunder from his first post in nearly two months, so head over and welcome him back. Additionally, Joel (Tai Chi Management) has popped back into circulation. He's indicated that pain management with the use of reiki has been a saving grace over the last 8 years. Looking it up on the Internet will bury you with data so I'm hoping he'll post more on his experiences and direct references with this. I'm getting a bit tired of my meals of aspirin, ibuprofen and sodium naproxen.

And finally, a change of address. Maggs, our South African Friend has had enough of the Blogger experience and is moving over to Wordpress. You will find her at http://www.maggsbunny.wordpress.com/ so make a note of it and catch up with her going's on in the heatwave she is enduring while we in the Northern Hemisphere shovel out from the drifts of snow.


Crossposted from Charles's site as a service to mankind!

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Tuesday, January 23, 2007

 

Bumper to Bumper, Dust to Dust

hp
Fairly dull of late. Mid winter doldrums I suppose. There is one thing of note other than the absurdly dense traffic this morning. Well, that and the preponderance of red light runners that is vexing my morning commute. Saw the twisted metal results of that this morning. A large luxury sedan creamed a foreign economy model at the intersection where I usually turn to go to TSD practice. The Large Sedan looked like it was in fairly good shape but the tinfoil on tires which it t-boned was certainly not going to be going anywhere quickly without a tow truck.

This leads me to an incident the yesterday late afternoon on my way to pick up the Tyrants from DayCare/ReEducation Camp. There is a short bit of road (County Line Road) that goes from 4 lanes to 2 lanes where a lot of surly contention takes place. As it is my habit to remain in the right hand lane, I take notice of 4 signs indicating that the left lane will soon terminate and the travelers should merge right. No indication is ever presented that the right lane is terminating or that the occupants of the right lane should merge, yield or subsume control to the left lane occupants. As it is with rational people, I allow one person to slide in between the vehicle in front of me ... a show of good faith and trust that the next person will slide in behind me. This was not good enough apparently. The village idiot driving the new little plastic toyota behind the vehicle I let in suddenly sped up to be next to me and started to crowd me off the road! This was half way into the merge area and I'm not sure why her sudden change in heart about the unwritten agreement compelled her to censure this tacit arrangement. Of course, I'm driving a 10 year old POS Saturn and she is apparently driving a 4 month old compact. Calmly, I follow the path of traffic and she backs of, gesticulating madly. Then, without cause, reason or rationality, she swerves into the median and blasts past 4 cars to cut off some less obstinate fellow. The girl who was driving was obviously younger, less rational and demonstrably temperamental. Her passenger was much too busy hiding his face, most likely out of fear of death by embarrassment, to betray any personality deficits (other than a poor choice of car-pool comrades). It's irascible behavior on her part (enabled by those who allow it to continue) which tends to get people killed ... either by crushing contusions of dashboards or crowbars. One of two things will help me avoid these people in the future; a significantly larger vehicle or significantly higher gasoline prices. I wonder if I can get a Veggie-diesel halftrack.

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Friday, January 19, 2007

 

Weekend 20070119-21

hp
Hooo-kay now, let's crank up the 'way-back machine' and recap what I've been up to (or down to) over the last few days. Back in the previous century ... sayyy, Friday. Yes, Friday. I was having a rather difficult time. You see, I've spent the week eating primarily fruit, nuts and high fiber veggies. No time for meat, you see. Well, the end result was multiple potty trips mixed in with a prodigious volume of biologically manufactured gas. Yeah, I was not a happy camper. Later that night, after I had disgorged most of my internal organs, the Tyrants and I were off to TSD class. Finally, after multiple lectures, practice sessions and one-on-one sessions, Jovial Jake finally got his 1st stripe. This was not an extemporaneous activity. You should have seen his head virtually explode when he realized that he managed to get through all 20 moves without a misstep of flawed stance. I swear I could count every one of his teeth when that smile broke out over his face. Now, he just needs to catch up to his sister with the other 2 forms (variations of the first one) and the rivalry will really get cranked up. I'm so darned proud of that little punk.

Saturday afternoon, we had a birthday party for another set of twins. Yet another one of the Mrs's co-workers produced a boy-girl set and this was their 1st birthday. Yes, I know. I'm counting the number of families we are connected to that have twins: 5 to date. Two college friends, 2 co-workers, 1 sister of co-worker. Like some sort of top-secret breeding program ... I've said too much. Just stare deeply into the monitor ... the wipe will be painless and take only a second *********** ... Yes. As I was saying, with all the little ones running about the party, it was inevitable that I would pick up a virus from one of those little mobile petri dishes. We left there fairly late and I was feeling that usual run-down blech of melancholy you get when you are at the first stages of an illness. The next morning, it was at full force and Alexis, of all people, was the culprit. Jake is typically the one to bring home unwelcome guests. He'll contract it soon enough. All things said though, she handles this stuff much better than the Sissy-Nancy-boys of the Manor.

Sunday held a bit of a treat for the Church-Going folk of the manor. There was the usual Sunday School at 1000 hours which the Tyrants actually look forward to. Odd that they ask to go to Sunday School in the middle of the week and Jake will suddenly break into song at random moments singing one of the little ditties ( the best he can ) to the Mrs. I'm sure she is certain that brain washing is occurring, but as the class 'Sargent at Arms' I can attest that the greatest amount of activity is the insistence that the children sit down and listen for more than 15 seconds. So, there I was in the Parochial School tending to coats and attendance records and such when the Program Director, her learning disabled sister and the 'Actually Certified Teacher' rush over to the windows bank of windows facing the rectory and Main Church Building. Interested, I shuffle over and caught a glimpse of something you only see once in a decade. Apparently, Cardinal Rigali deemed it appropriate to pay our parish a visit. The whole procession was in attendance including a battalion of my fellow KoC Brothers. WHAT!? They did not call on me! Oh, yes, of course. They would want the fit-as-a-fiddle 75 year old men to act as color guard instead of a brash, ornery and lame 39yr old 3rd degree. There are rules son, don't you know. So, directly after class ended I shuttled the Tyrants over to the vestibule so that they could meet the Cardinal close up. A glow settled over them as the Tyrants were mystically transformed into pristine little angels and they waved gracefully ... and he paused, smiled and waved back before moving on to his next engagement. Well, ain't that something!? They were fascinated and quite frustrated that we were not going to attend the assembly in the school auditorium afterwards so they could bask in his presence a bit more. I've never seen children more interested in attending church and these two. Not a bad thing, at all.

Later in the day, the Mrs and I had our weekly 'Doggie Dip Date' and then I wrapped up the day by restocking the fire-wood brackets while she was off shopping. Yes, venturing out into the cold and wind while sick is not an enjoyable task, but coming in to a roaring fire after each load is about as close to heaven as you can get when your sinuses are trying to simulate a mucus comprised nor-easter. And to wrap up the weekend, it snowed about 1/16 of an inch to make the morning commute all that more interesting. Of course, they salted the living daylights out of the local roads so there were no accidents this time, just a lot of people driving really slow. Taught them old dogs a new trick. Drive slow when slippery, who woulda thunk!?



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Slip sliding away ...

hp

You know the nearer your destination, the more you slip sliding away ... Yeah, pretty much the theme song for the commute this morning. Fortunately for me, not my fate. The pittance of snow from yesterday promptly melted, before nightfall ... then froze into a slick sheet of veneer ice on the local roadways. Then, the dropping temperatures precipitated the remaining moisture out of the air and covered the ice with a ethereal layer of snow. The SUV morons jumped on the roads with their AWD/ABS behemoths and found that they were promptly issued a clue by ramming into anything that was within meters of their assumed paths. I spotted no less than 3 major accidents between the DayCare/ReEducation Compound and my place of employment. That averages out to fender bender every 4.5 kilometers. The advantage of having a 10 year old car without ABS or AWD or any other comfort options is that you are fairly certain you will end up with the engine block in your lap if you try anything risky. Low, slow and break early. It got me to work in 30 minutes and I did not soil myself out of sheer terror. The lassitudes of the daily grind tend to 'melt away' when you see the feeble attempts of chicanery by your local village idiot troupe end with such a spectacular debacle.



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Thursday, January 18, 2007

 

NEWS FLASH!

hp
ALERT! It is snowing in SE Pennsyltucky. It might even stick to the non-paved surfaces till the morning sun obviates it. BTW, the picture in no way represents what is going on outside.



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Empty Skull

hp
I'm back ... barely. Been busier than a puppy with two peters of late. Oddly though, there is nothing of note to really talk about ... nothing banging about my empty noggin of late. I'm on a project right now that just had it's scheduled truncated by 50% so I'll be a tad brief with my posts for the next week or so. That is, provided the effort is not canceled all together like my last one. Now, over the last few days, only a handful of noteworthy events have come to pass. First off, I've re-injured my right knee. Walking down stairs of all things. I've got to remember to make copious use of the hand rails and abandon the practice of taking 2-3 steps in a gait. I'm not as spry as I was once and the joint damage isn't going to let me forget that any time soon. It needs to heal by Feb 3rd when I'm apparently listed for yet another TSD test ... this time with the highly motivated Alexis hot on my tail. She is going for her Yellow Belt now and if I don't keep one step ahead of her, she'll be 'schooling' me all too soon. I wonder what the Orthopaedic physician who diagnosed me 12 years ago would think about my condition today. Given the numerous physical activities I engage in now and the sullen look on his face when he had to break the news, I would think he may have to re-evaluate his preconceived notions.

Monday was MLK day and my new employer gives that as a corporate holiday. Now, the DayCare/ReEducation Facility was open and the Always Alluring Mrs had the day off. It would be great if we could both spend some quality time together but ... there is always a but ... the Tyrants get President's day off. Both the Mrs and I do not. After a quick conversation with my supervisor, we came to an agreement that I would come in on that Monday and be the only person in the complex so I could watch the fortunate twins on February 19th. Being the uxorious type, I let the Mrs take the opportunity to stay home on Monday so she could have a day of slakerdom. We slept in a bit and snuggled before I had to run out the door. She agreed to let the kids sleep in and take them to school instead of me, so I was able to arrive at the complex before the sun cast it's pale, thin light across the slumbering suburbia.

Later in the week, the Mrs comes to pick the Tyrants up from TSD practice so I can stay for the adult class. That happens three times a week so it's not too much a burden on either of us. This particular time, it was Thursday and that is Pizza night in the Haupertonian Household. The pungent odor was heavy in the cargo area of the Family Tank v2.0 as I buckled Alert Alexis into her Gunner's turret. A asked her what she smelled and she shouted out 'Pig Brains!'. Heh, yeah. The Mrs gave me that 'YOUR are going to pay for therapy' look and off they went. My little girl is growing up to be a tom-boy, even if she does like pink sparklely pants. Oh, and her propensity to sing ad-hoc songs like "I don't like your Ma-Ma because she is mean" should not be held against her. I listen to country-western radio and she might be picking up the underlying themes. No complaints here, I'm not a big fan of what some of the more popular rock music is based on. You know, slapping your b*tch down and popping caps in every one's *ss and such. Nope, I'm content with the Tyrants being somewhat red-neck. It works down here in the South. Yes, I consider Pennsyltucky the south. At least this part.

Speaking of the balmy south, it got rather warm here for a week or so, and now it's freezing cold again. Last month's utility bill came out to $170 ... a January record for us! The average temperature was 46F. Speaking of that, there is this:

New PA Driving Law May Affect Your Winter Commute
Effective January 29, 2007 all motorists in Pennsylvania MUST turn on their headlights whenever they use their windshield wipers in inclement weather. This new law applies when wipers are fully on or in intermittent use. Violators may be fined $25 but fees/other costs will increase the amount to $100.
This was enacted by the Legislature and signed into law by Gov. Ed Rendell in November. Pennsylvania now joins Maryland, Virginia and West Virginia in having a wiper-headlight law.[ed. NJ also has this law ... poor research in this article]
While the regulation doesn't officially go into effect until the 29th, the Pennsylvania Department of Transportation is asking all drivers to adopt the new measure as of January 1.

One last thing. This is regarding the pool parking pricks. You know, the ones that park in spaces next to the handicap spots so you cannot open your doors. Well, the other day, I pull into a spot and there is a woman parked half on the grass and a bit over the line of the HP spot. Sooooo, I pull in and then make a big scene about struggling to open the door to let the kids out. She is sitting in her drivers seat, talking on the cell phone ... oblivious. On top of that, she is plucking hair out of her lower leg whit a tweezer. Eventually, she looks up and notices me trying to muddle through in the 5 inches of space left between the two vehicles. She rolls down the window and announces that she is there to help me! She is going to repark her car to another spot so I can open my doors. I think she was afraid I would muck up her BMW SUV with cripple germs. So, she pulls away and within seconds ANOTHER person tries to park in the exact same spot. I stand my ground and hold my hands 1 foot apart showing the new pool parking prick woman how much space I expect her to leave for me. Tacitly, she complies which leaves her passenger door wedged up against a transformer. Rules are rules and I'm pretty flexible about that sort of thing so long as you don't make my life miserable when you feel the urge to break them. Next time I'll have the twins slide up next to me with a big sign 'Poor and homeless, we live in this parking spot.' I'll need some tattered overcoats and an old tin cup with coins in it.

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Tuesday, January 09, 2007

 

Roundup 20070109

Happy new year and all that other cruft. It's been a while since I've had the opportunity or time (read: motivation) to getting around to this. Many of you have been a bit quiet over the holidays and with good reason. No need for you to be haunting the subnets when you could deal with the 3 ghosts of Christmas right at home! So, let's get this new year rolling!

First off, I'd like to point out that Sherry over at WordSalad needs to be dealt with ASAP. She is showing her true form as a Borg and is twiddling with her Audio Implants in an effort to spy on us all via electronic signals! That, or MS is getting the best of her peripherals. I like to go with the tin-foil hat theory so I'll stick with the Star Trek theme. When you start mentioning things like pulse width and processing speed, you KNOW that warp drives are not far behind. Sure, she is only at warp 0.9 now, but before you know it, you're assimilated with a laser eyeball and a satellite dish mounted on your noggin.

Charles (self referential here?) dug up a new (to me) MS Blogger out there who is trying to raise a boat load of cash to support MS research. Good for her! Go over and take a peek at what Allison Reynolds is up to. Very early on but still very promising. Keep tuned for a potential interview by Charles On that note, Dave and I also noticed a little article regarding stem cell research. It's a fantastic read and more oriented around the idea that the opposing forces have a new discovery to rally around that is acceptable to all. Well, except for Christian Scientists, but they have their own ideas about medicine.

Context Switch: Tyron is doing her best to survive the winter in the snow-bound North-Western region of the US. She even has a pic of one of the elusive regional garden gargoyles falling victim to Gaia's fickle fits. Here is to the hope that she will manage to tunnel out from her redoubt before the next aerial assault hits in a few days. I offered to swap my 2 inches of mud for her 7 feet of snow, but she seemed relatively uninterested. I guess the idea of bulb flowers in February was less appealing than shoveling snow in April.

Speaking of shut-in, Pat over at MSCompanion is dealing with a self imposed quarantine. Looks like her and her hubby are playing dueling banjos with infectious seasonal diseases. Flu shots help, but you can still get sick. Break out the wet-wipes and anti-bacterial had gel before you surf over ... you don't want to catch a keyboard virus! And as for her take on vaccinations: "Hurray for moping! After all, it could have been deathly ill, flat-out in bed, with vomiting and diarrhea." Yep, I suppose a couple seconds of needle prick is a small price to pay in order to avoid the alternative.

Erik is back after a long spot. Just off the juice too after a rough ride with an MS Exacerbation. Steroids are always a tricky subject, and sometimes a neccessary evil. With three munchkins running about the house and a tower of managers hovering over your head, every little advantage should be taken. Even if it does leave a bad taste in your mouth and an insatiable appetite for month old Chrismass candies to boot.

Pam at Looking Forward is picking up Yoga. Even with a peanut gallery giving her emotional support, it's tough to get started with something as physically demanding and hope to keep it up. One good illness or flare-up can knock you off your tracks. I certanly hope that this "Proud Warrior" can go the distance and get those high-school blue jeans to fit again. With all the postive lifestyle changes she has implemented, I'm certain that this will be a great year for her and her and her Yoga Mat.

While we are on the subject of change, it looks like Zee has done a little plastic surgery on her site. Take a peek but if you don't have anything nice to say, keep it to yourself. Otherwise, you'll be getting a delivery of fetid shark steaks delivered some time in March. An idle threat, I'm sure. I mean, who would waste such a treat! Now, fish entrails I can see. But never mind that, the site is fantastic no matter what she has to say about Cascading Style Sheets. And she is content. As content as we should all be. It those moments inbetween that defines our journey though this troubled world. Cherish the moments, for they are all that we really possess.

Crossposted from Charles's site as a service to mankind!

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Unspecified mundanity of unknown origin

hp
This is going to be a short one since there has been little rattling about my head lately. Of course, I've been so intent on work and such that I was hunched over my workstation a little too tensely for a little too long and strained this particularly troublesome set of muscles in my back. Right between the shoulder blades where I have no chance of massaging them myself. Urgh, what kind of work-place injury is that! It might be some lingering soft tissue damage from the accident 6 or so months ago. Little things like that creep up every so often. Most likely not MS, it doesn't usually present itself this way. And while I'm on the topic of chronic annoyances, we got a bit of mail from the insurance company who is handling the other persons side of it. They have decided that since there were no witnesses, it is now my fault (that she ran a red light) and I should pay them $11K. Uh-huh. Tell me that I'm surprised. Actually, I am a bit. I thought they would wait for another year so that I've completely forgotten all the details. I could have probably asked the Tyrants about it though and they would give me a blow by blow of the incident. Complete with rainbow puppies jumping out of the bushes and firetrucks shooting their hoses manned by 12 ballerina Barbie princesses. It's the details that matter, you know.

Other than the standard daily annoyances mentioned above, my traffic woes have mostly been quite mundane. I've found that there have been A LOT of dump trucks and sundry construction vehicles on the road these past few days. No good reason for this though. Road construction season is over. These lumbering hulks tend to waddle down the fast lane and really muck up the flow of traffic. They have to be in the fast lane since the slow lane is so cluttered with cruft and telephone poles they would eventually hit something. The various signage is posted right on the curb so the metal plaques hang out into the line of traffic and that is a prime target for the rear view mirrors on the cabs. So, into the passing lane they go and there I sit behind these belching leviathans till either I turn off or they do. A whole 15 minutes of torture I tell ya. I'll survive. At least traffic is moving, albeit slowly.

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Monday, January 08, 2007

 

Weekend 20070105-7

3x2BD
I really did my best to slack off this weekend, much to the dismay and disappointment to the Perpetually Moving Mrs. Of course, it Friday night was easy for me. It was just me and Princess Grumpy Pants at the Acid Pool Swim Club and TSD. It made things so much easier that I only had to watch one, but I still had that tingle in the back of my mind that something was up. I've been conditioned. It must be those little whispers in my ear at night when the Tyrants sneak into the room and leave subliminal messages for me to follow. I'll need to investigate that.

Saturday was easy too for no real good reason. The Mrs and I stayed up late, got up even later. The kids managed to harass us enough that we did get up in time for our Amiable Neighbor Gus to stop by and give the kids Russian/Greek/Eastern Orthodox Christmas gifts. He was worried since they had not seen us in a month of Sundays. He and his Mrs Irene gave them two hard cover books: The Kissing Hand and The Giving Tree. I read them and found them to be exceptional with the depth of character development and moral certainty. Yeah, and the words were small enough for me so I did not have to look them up. Later, we were off to a birthday party (shown above) and I noticed something as I was herding the family into the POS SuperSaturn. Not that it was friggen 81 degrees, but that all the bulbs I planted in November/December had started breaking through the soil. Well, not actually. They had already done that and were a full 3 inches above ground. If this keeps up, I'll have tulips and daffodils in Feburary. Then we'll be the unwilling recipient of the typical March Slop Storm that will dump 3 feet of slush on us and that will spell the end for my fall bulbs. The fact that the furnace rarely turns on and the wood stove is more than enough to keep the Manor warm will be offset by the 100$ in bulbs that are now doomed to a horrific misadventure. Worse yet, if we don't get a long and hard freeze, my carrots yet in the garden will need to be pulled (they wont rot) and every skeeter, gnat and associated biting insect will survive the winter and we'll have a veritable PLAGUE of the nasty b*st*rds. I should invest in bug-zappers and insect repellent. Speaking of Nasty Biting B*st*rds, the birthday party went REALLY well. Three sets of twins from mixed race parents. Never saw a cuter bunch of kids. The Grandfather was considering Eugenics and trying to figure out which child should get married to which other child. EGADS! Although, the thought was an interesting concept to contemplate. Nope, not going there.

Sunday was slow. The big activity for the day was the Weekly date with the Mrs in the back-yard, scooping up mountains of poop. Yes, romance and flies were in the air. I suppose I could pick it up and dispose of the byproducts when the 'Dump Trucks' unload, but it is still dark at that hour an I don't want to have to go turd hunting in the dark. I can see me strapping an IR laser to the pooper-scooper and wearing Light Enhancement Night Oculars to do this. My neighbors would think I'm some sort of deranged sniper. Walking about with night goggles, a long pole with a laser sight on it and dressed in tighty-whities and combat boots. Yep, the guys with pressed uniforms, a white van and a padded room would be summoned no doubt. And they would be bogged down in the anti-Elysian Fields of doggie-dip demise. Peek-a-boo amongst the doodie-doo.

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Friday, January 05, 2007

 

grit

hp
So, around noon yesterday I get a call from the DayCare/ReEducation Facility. They inform me that Jake has a fever of 104 and they cannot keep him. Some nonsense about liability. Yep, I'm the designated chauffeur/amublance driver so I scoot off to pick up Patient 0. I'm doing this in spite of the knowledge that when I get within a mile of the walking petri dish, I will contract whatever he is carrying. It's a 99.75% certainty. Granted, this was just a fever with no outward signs of being anything other than the usual day-care deathtrap disease. You know, two days of suffering followed by a week or two of 2000psi sinus clogging mucus. I was delayed a bit after having to contend with two funeral processions on the way. Nothing like having to wait at an intersection for three light changes because the funeral procession is so long that it strings out for 2 blocks. The lead car stops for lights and the 'train' blocks the We hit the pediatrician's office at 1300 and they say what I was thinking. Of course, we are both wrong. Jake is complaining that his tummy hurts and I notice that he had not eaten his lunch. Fine, here is some syrup of ipecac and a little cod-liver oil to make it go down easy. And up came everything from the pancakes he had for breakfast to the chocolate milk I was giving him to rehydrate. Alexis was disappointed that we did not go to the pool or karate, but after that show she became a touch more reserved about her effervescent criticism of my obviously lacking parental skills. Later that night, Jake repeats the performance by producing the juice and fruit snacks he had requested after waking from a short nap. A long soak in a bubble bath was comforting and lured him back to sleep after a shot of fever/pain reducing nanobots.

Of course, some time around 0200, Jake attempts to get into the Master Bed of Lofty Slumber with poor results. No, not that ... he got his head and torso onto the bed and just flopped over leaving his legs dangling over the end. I dragged the limp form up to the pillows and his agitation began immediately. The Mrs, having little tolerance for a poor nights sleep, carried him back to his bed and tucked him in. I could have left the bed myself and let him have my pre-warmed space but he is such a combative sleeper. In the end, I have no doubt that he would have kicked both of us out. Morning breaks (or, as is the case, flopped in) and It's all rush-rush-rush. Jake is still burning the walls with his fever so I give him another gallon of Tylenol and we tuck him into our bed. The Mrs is staying with him so she concentrates on comforting him as he wistfully watches his sister eat her breakfast. We know that if he tries this he will hold it down for 15 minutes (as is demonstrated later in the morning). I was in such a state this morning that I did not realize that I had left my laptop in the A-5 basement computer center till I had gotten to work. Argh. Even though I got there at 0730, I could not just turn around and go fetch it. I resolved to get it after my morning staff meeting and just use the Dev Lab systems to do my work and leave email to stack up in my inbox. Friday afternoons are 'Pass the Buck' carnivals where everyone tries to get all pending request 'taken care of' via email. Monday comes and the 0915 email status request email with everyone from the CEO on down in the CC list will be inevitable. Best way to combat that is to have an immediate delay response. Fail that and you are stuck thinking about it all weekend. It was critical that I get to my email at the first opportunity. Of course, the Mrs calls before I leave and asks me to pick up Gatoraid and Saltines on the way over. Yes, yes, of course I can sacrifice 10 minutes for the welfare of my only male heir. Let it be known that after 0900 on any given week-day, nearly all the people on the road have no place to go and all day to get there. What takes me 20 minutes in rush hour took me 50% longer. Sure, it was raining (stinking Pennsyltucky winters) but man, 25 in a 45 is just UNCOOL. I have critical supplies of crackers and funky water to deliver to the settlement that is in a state of viral SIEGE! Alas, I dock the POS SuperSaturn, visit Jake who grins from ear to ear when I give him the 'yummies-n-toys', and then I'm off again for another meeting after grabbing my laptop. Gotta forward that buck because we have a birthday party to go to this weekend. Can't be distracted from the cake with nonsense about multi-node database replication or java bean services. Who said settling down and raising a family would be dull?



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Thursday, January 04, 2007

 

Slow day at the assembly line

hp
Yesterday and and this past evening really amounted to very little. Wake, Drive, Work, Drive, Swim, Drive, Karate, Karate, Drive, Put the kids to bed, Stoke fire, Sleep. Yep. That mendacity is pretty much the gears of my week-days. I should not complain though, it's what I aspired to. Of course, the adult class was mostly sissy exercise at till I get an approbation to resume foot-work from Master Ken. Calisthenics and '6 inches' was the limit to my participation with the rest of the class. I could participate in the rest of the instruction with the explicit warning that my feet do not leave the floor. That is all good and well provided that I pay attention to what I'm doing with the forms. The punctilios of appropriate form vex me greatly when restricted by the various splints, braces and support girders. Robo-Cop is a fleshy lump of the supple and free flowing movement compared to my staccato manner wrapped within my own cybernetic cocoon.



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Wednesday, January 03, 2007

 

I just threw up a little bit in my mouth ...

hp
So, I like moon cakes. You ever have one of those? A traditional Chinese treat that is exchanged at the feast of the harvest moon. Some do not find these very palatable, such as the ever slender Mrs, which only leaves more for me! Knowing my ever questing sweet tooth, the Mrs purchased a pack of 8 mini-mooncakes and basically told me to got to town. I finally was presented with the opportunity to sample these delectable treats yesterday at lunch and eagerly ripped the package asunder. Cradling the first morsel like the most holy communion wafer, it was enveloped by my salivating maw and I began to masticate it with much fervor. Then, the taste hit me. I was so bound up with rapture over this little treasure I failed to inspect the packaging with any great seriousness. In tiny, semi-transparent lettering, was the curse: '55% Durian Mhonthong'. If you have ever run afoul of a rotting corpse of a skunk at the bottom of a 55gallon grease-trap, you have not even scraped the surface of what it means to be of the fruit family Durian. No cry of anguish would suffice for the disappointment and dismay of my poor little taste-buds. The ripped themselves out by their roots and flung themselves down my throat just for a momentary escape from this abomination. And there I stood, gnashing away like a garbage truck in hopes of disposing of this epicurean menace as quickly as possible. Being who I am, I swallowed the mess. Tactical error. Big time. For the rest of the day, the gaseous upper digestive emanations of the fermenting wad lodged deep within my guts haunted me like prison yard tattoo. Worse yet, my attempts to drown the vile beastie with coffee and bleach only spread it to my kidneys and badder. I was reminded of this hapless effort every time I had to pee. This was about every 15 minutes. I can only come to one conclusion about the Durian and it's admirers: It will certainly overshadow the most vile body odor and swaddle the recidivist drunkard from 18th century Paris a pristine cloak of white in comparison when set next to the Durian Eaters. Ghaaa!

Less gut-wrenching news: Swimming with kids went well. Our old-lady friends were back and interrogated the Tyrants as to what presents they received. The kids were a bit off since they had not been to the pool in nearly 2 weeks. It was showing. Fat little punks. Okay, yeah, they are about as muscular and lean as you would ever want a 4yr old to be. Their attitude was surly punkish and fat though. Onward, karate went as good as it could have and Jake got a little sit-down with the master about his surly and inattentive behavior. He is so OCD about keeping his eyes on things going on about him. This is why we are in the class to start with. He'll get there, he's just a little boy yet. That stripe is coming, I'll just have to spend a bit more time with him than Alexis. Of course, Alert Alexis has already mastered her first three forms and is starting in on #4. I just managed that one! I supposed I'll have to cheat and read up on #5. I stuck around for the adult class afterwards and got the kid-glove treatment. I suppose falling to the ground when I tried to support my weight on the bum leg got me a healthy slice of sympathy. If I keep this up, Alexis will be telling me to do push-ups when she gets her Orange belt before me.



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Tuesday, January 02, 2007

 

ow-ow-owwwie

hp
I certainly hope you all have a very Merry Christmas and an equally liquid filled New Years Eve. Over the last two weeks, I've driven to the FOB and back again, watched the Twin Tyrants open a mountain of toys and slept in till noon on multiple occasions. I also managed to pop my right knee out of it's socket and spent 5 minutes crying like a little girl on the Karate mat. That pretty much put an end to anything I was going to do on the two days I took off before the weekend. So, other than the damage I've done to myself via physical exertion or the lifting of a bottle, I'm going to write off 2006 as a mixed bag. Just for good measure, the entire Family Haupertonian slept in this morning. Make that vacation last just a few more minutes, you know. They did not wake until I dropped them in the back seat of the POS SuperSaturn and they were quite morose about the whole 'return to normality' deal. Join the crowd kids.



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