White Lightning Axiom: Redux

Sadly enough, I have one item ... a nagging little tick burrowing deep within my flaccid midsection ... to discuss today. The other day I was thinking to myself that I should go check my wight on the bathroom scale and see what these past few months of heavy exertion have done for me. An hour of swimming with the kids ... and hour of TSD with the kids every week day and then another 90 minutes of Adult TSD three times a week. With my all fruit/veggie diet for breakfast/lunch during the week I would be nothing but lean, sinew and taught muscle. Nope, the numbers stabbing back at my ego blew me away. 205. Say what-WHA!? How? How in God's green earth (brown, if you live in Pennsyltucky) did I GAIN 10 pounds? It must be some genetic survival trait I've harbored in my Minnesota Midsection till this day when upon nearing my 39th birthday, it has suddenly switched on. Hmmm ... I certainly hope I am not doomed to gain 39lb! I think I must finally admit that my absurd hyper metabolism is really slowing down and my days of wolfing down 28 oz steaks on the weekends should probably come to a close. That, or I should stop raiding the Tyrants Halloween candy surplus. Getting at it is no mean feat, mind you. Laser beam triggers, pressure plates, giant rolling stone ball, spike filled pits with cyborg snakes. The Mrs has a similar setup to guard her chips, but I get though anyways. Determined am I. Then again, if I did some seated aerobic exercise while mouldering away at the keyboard all day, like some deranged medieval monk, I suppose I could slough off a few pounds. You know, now that I think about it, there is that pizza night we have on Thursdays ... and the lo-meign night on Wednesdays ... and the carb-loading pasta-rific meals the rest of the week. Hmmmm. That, and I've been negligent about chopping some of the remaining wood. Perhaps I should talk to Tyra Banks about this.

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