White Lightning Axiom: Redux

So, around noon yesterday I get a call from the DayCare/ReEducation Facility. They inform me that Jake has a fever of 104 and they cannot keep him. Some nonsense about liability. Yep, I'm the designated chauffeur/amublance driver so I scoot off to pick up Patient 0. I'm doing this in spite of the knowledge that when I get within a mile of the walking petri dish, I will contract whatever he is carrying. It's a 99.75% certainty. Granted, this was just a fever with no outward signs of being anything other than the usual day-care deathtrap disease. You know, two days of suffering followed by a week or two of 2000psi sinus clogging mucus. I was delayed a bit after having to contend with two funeral processions on the way. Nothing like having to wait at an intersection for three light changes because the funeral procession is so long that it strings out for 2 blocks. The lead car stops for lights and the 'train' blocks the We hit the pediatrician's office at 1300 and they say what I was thinking. Of course, we are both wrong. Jake is complaining that his tummy hurts and I notice that he had not eaten his lunch. Fine, here is some syrup of ipecac and a little cod-liver oil to make it go down easy. And up came everything from the pancakes he had for breakfast to the chocolate milk I was giving him to rehydrate. Alexis was disappointed that we did not go to the pool or karate, but after that show she became a touch more reserved about her effervescent criticism of my obviously lacking parental skills. Later that night, Jake repeats the performance by producing the juice and fruit snacks he had requested after waking from a short nap. A long soak in a bubble bath was comforting and lured him back to sleep after a shot of fever/pain reducing nanobots.

Of course, some time around 0200, Jake attempts to get into the Master Bed of Lofty Slumber with poor results. No, not that ... he got his head and torso onto the bed and just flopped over leaving his legs dangling over the end. I dragged the limp form up to the pillows and his agitation began immediately. The Mrs, having little tolerance for a poor nights sleep, carried him back to his bed and tucked him in. I could have left the bed myself and let him have my pre-warmed space but he is such a combative sleeper. In the end, I have no doubt that he would have kicked both of us out. Morning breaks (or, as is the case, flopped in) and It's all rush-rush-rush. Jake is still burning the walls with his fever so I give him another gallon of Tylenol and we tuck him into our bed. The Mrs is staying with him so she concentrates on comforting him as he wistfully watches his sister eat her breakfast. We know that if he tries this he will hold it down for 15 minutes (as is demonstrated later in the morning). I was in such a state this morning that I did not realize that I had left my laptop in the A-5 basement computer center till I had gotten to work. Argh. Even though I got there at 0730, I could not just turn around and go fetch it. I resolved to get it after my morning staff meeting and just use the Dev Lab systems to do my work and leave email to stack up in my inbox. Friday afternoons are 'Pass the Buck' carnivals where everyone tries to get all pending request 'taken care of' via email. Monday comes and the 0915 email status request email with everyone from the CEO on down in the CC list will be inevitable. Best way to combat that is to have an immediate delay response. Fail that and you are stuck thinking about it all weekend. It was critical that I get to my email at the first opportunity. Of course, the Mrs calls before I leave and asks me to pick up Gatoraid and Saltines on the way over. Yes, yes, of course I can sacrifice 10 minutes for the welfare of my only male heir. Let it be known that after 0900 on any given week-day, nearly all the people on the road have no place to go and all day to get there. What takes me 20 minutes in rush hour took me 50% longer. Sure, it was raining (stinking Pennsyltucky winters) but man, 25 in a 45 is just UNCOOL. I have critical supplies of crackers and funky water to deliver to the settlement that is in a state of viral SIEGE! Alas, I dock the POS SuperSaturn, visit Jake who grins from ear to ear when I give him the 'yummies-n-toys', and then I'm off again for another meeting after grabbing my laptop. Gotta forward that buck because we have a birthday party to go to this weekend. Can't be distracted from the cake with nonsense about multi-node database replication or java bean services. Who said settling down and raising a family would be dull?

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Labels: Banalities