White Lightning Axiom: Redux

SO, how did the class go last night? Not too shabby. We spent the whole time inside reading over a book regarding the obvious topic while the sky outside was rent asunder by great discharges of lightning and boisterous blasts of rolling and cracking thunder. It was quite a show and we were visited with flooding and power loss throughout the area this morn. The Agricultural Sector may appreciate the great drop in local temperatures, but I'll have to be satisfied with less since I had not managed to set up my damned water barrel system yet. Such a slacker, I am.

Two other things to bring up: first, entertainment. Deb-Deb sent this to me which, oddly enough, made me smile and feel good inside. I cannot explain it, but it is fascinating how it worked. The guy has some killer dance moves too! As for poetry in motion, you may have noticed that little widget in the upper portion of my left side bar showing the current price of oil. With the recent drop in oil futures, the local gasoline purveyor is hawking his goods at $3.91 USD/gal here. This is odd, no? Less oil is being pumped, but some of us got the message and stopped driving our MegaTon SUVs to the end of the driveway to get the mail. Gosh, market forces in action!

Technorati Tags:Gas | Weather | Rain | Gardening | Motorcycle

Labels: Gardening, Gas, Motorcycle, Rain, Weather

Late, late, late. So sorry. Really, cannot you just grasp the visceral experience of my sorry-ness just oozing from the screen? No? Sigh ... okay, yeah. So I've been preoccupied. Let's just skip all that perfidy and get down to the rub, eh? Last Friday, yes. Dodge Ball and swimming ... all good except that the pool heater had been broken all week and by the end of the run the pool temperature had dropped to something just short of freezing. This morning, the ambient air temperature was somewhere around 38F so you can imagine the blue-lip experience I was getting from all that semi-liquid wonderfulness. The kids did not mind one bit though. I cannot fathom how latitudinarian they seem to be about heat or the lack there of. Must be the Minnesota Blood I contributed to their genetic makeup. That, or the nano-bot fusion heaters running about their bodies. Either way, on top of the 'energy death' cold days, it's been raining consistenly all week so mowing the lawn had to be skipped. Fortunately, I scalped the pastoral expanse last week so I could skip this weekend without having to worry about looking for Doctor Livingston in the Darkest Heart of Africa the following week. I need to weed the Haupertonian Agricultural Sector too ... this extended cool period has really been a boon for the leafy greens and pea. Totally out of control! I've been eating salads freshly picked every night for the last week and I've got 10 bins all set up for this week (lunch, dinner). Delish! (no, I'm not stealing this from that faux personality who whores for Dunkin Donuts)

This Saturday, after a rocky start, we got going at 1000 hours for a favored destination ... Sesame Place! Nice and close, about one gallon of gasoline for a round trip. Of course, as noted, we have had a flood recently of a mostly semi-liquid slurry of liquid hydrogen and suspended dark-matter. It was concentrated in the water-based attractions and you KNOW that Attila required me to ride with her on the more vigorous rides. The ducky-ride, one of the favorites, was particularly chilly being the first thing we hit after Ghengis' required visit to the Super Grover Roller-Coaster: VaporTrail. The upside is that we never had to wait for more than 60 seconds to get on ANY wet ride attraction we were interested in. The dry rides took a bit more patience, but nothing out of the ordinary. Tea-cups, Blast-off and Flying Fish were the only lines. All in all, well worth the kidney I had to give up for the season passes. On the way to the Park, we noticed a new restaurant on Street Road just before we got onto the Freeway. It's called Ristorante Toscana 52. I thought we could stop off on the way back home (park closes at 1700 hours) for a quick bite to size the place up. Well, it was absurdly wonderful. A bit more pricey than Carrabas, but a culinary treat of surprising proportions. I think we were lucky to arrive so early since when leaving roughly 1.5 hours later, the lot was overflowing into the street and the waiting area was mobbed. Note to the wise, always arrive early. A brief tirade, but there is no reason to waste bits of your life waiting for food and service if you do not have to.

Sunday, it rained. Slacked about, folded some laundry and actually relaxed a bit. Bizarre, guilty feeling made the whole experience rather uncomfortable. My tendency towards pluripotency when it comes to activities is a hard predilection to rally against. I'm finding that imparting this trait upon my scion is a case of low hanging fruit ... if they are not doing something, they want to help me do something. I dread the day we let them start playing with the Wii. This should help us with the reward points for system usage.

Technorati Tags:Gas | Swimming | Karate | Children | Rain | Sesame Place

Labels: Children, Gas, Rain, Sesame Place, Swimming, Tang So Doo, Weather, Weekend

To all my friends and family up north, Prayers and Hope that you will remain safe:

The scale of Sunday’s chain-reaction pileup on Interstate 390 is best described by the numbers:

Thirty-six tangled vehicles.

Twenty-five people injured, including one teenager who later died.
Wind gusts up to 37 mph and blowing snow made seeing past the hood virtually impossible.

Buses that were headed to the Rochester Institute of Technology to pick up hockey teams were commandeered by the Gates Fire Department and used to keep people warm while the temperature slid to 18 degrees. Firefighters had requested buses as part of the rescue response, West said, but those buses “were in the right place at the right time.”

Grams and Gramp called last night after they arrived home and reported a bit of white stuff as well, but not the level of destruction going on in Rochester, NY.

Technorati Tags:Snow | Weather | Winter

Labels: Snow, Weather, Winter

I had started this Sunday Night ... but alas, the anti-soporific allure of the Television captured my attention and I ended up watching 'Tin Man' on the SciFi channel till the wee hours of the morning. These vicissitudes in my sleep patterns are doing me no good, I know. Sometimes I just want to watch a show without a squeaky clean animation character. Speaking of characters, the dodgeball/swim night went well on Friday ... followed closely the next morning of me hauling my sorry sagging rear out of bed at the absurd hour of 0745. The tyrants were rampaging though the house and this always invoked the 'WHINE' factor in the hounds. They understand if they simper long and loud, I'll eventually let them out to do their stuff on the back-50. Then, it's off to administer the death penalty to another innocent evergreen. I went to a small farm that I spotted on my commute to work that was selling live trees for $30 a pop. Free-range, yup. So I met a man by the name of Emmo who apparently had a son that went to Cornell! Funny. Even funnier was the damned ATM at the Wawa that I usually stop off at was out of order so I had to find a different working one. Cost me about 15 minutes. After I gingerly transported the 50 foot pine strapped to the top of the SuperSaturn POS with spit, duct tape and gumption, I cored it out and hauled it to the Grand Cathedral in the Manor with a bit of help from the Mrs. As you know, I have some slight balance issues and have learned to NOT TRUST my internal ear. Just because things feel like they are tipping to the left or right, that means nothing to gravity. I have to judge my 'uprightness' by checking my surroundings. Makes swimming a real bear. In any event, the Mrs gave her 'Seal of Approval' and the strings of lights were added. Ornamentation would come later at the deft hands (and myopic minds) of the Tyrants.

That afternoon, the whole clan spent time outdoors raking up leaves in the front expanse. The Mrs would rake to the curb, I would run the mower over the area to suck up the remaining leaves and detritus. Rake, mow, blow, suck ... ummm, yeah. We cleared out the front fairly well leaving mountains of leaves which were promptly blown back into the grass and garden beds. Damn. We had to do it though since we were expecting nasty weather the next day. With continuing unpleasantness through the rest of the winter. Indeed, it snowed that night and made a terrible mess. While we were at it, I had the Tyrants take the truck load of aging pumpkins from the front porch to the Agricultural Sector and SMASH THEM! HULK SMASH PUMPKINS!!! Heh ... time and place for everything, you know. They were starting to get a bit soft so it was time to dispose of them. I'm certain I'll get a lot of 'volunteers' next spring after I till them under. After the Mrs and I finished up with the leaves (the Tyrants abandoned us for the comfort of the wood-burning stove), I ran across the street to help our neighbor, Gus, with a couple of 25 foot tall trees that he needed to take down. Yep, just could not get enough lumberjacking in so I started in on the arboreal work in the local area. It took little time but the chain on the semi-commercial saw started to dull before we got to the hard part ... cutting the stump flush with the soil. Leaning over with a roaring chain-saw ... yep, I'm destined to be sore the next day. To cap off the day, I made some Bohemian Goulash and load of Beef Stroganoff for the week's meals. The Mrs made chicken wings (ACK!). The cavalcade of leftovers is never long lived. I'm not sure what I would do without the double-blessing of ground beef and pasta.

Sunny Sunday ... not so much. Snow, sleet and just general nastiness. This impacted the attendance at Sunday School too. Only 4 little smiling faces showed up ... all talking about how they were going to build snowmen and make snow angels in the slop that laid about the ground like a sodden quilt. Of course, we had to stop at Dunkin Donuts afterwards, and share the plunder with the Mrs back at the manor. The Tyrants decorated the tree and put nearly all their ornaments within the first 3 feet from the floor. Looks good to them I suppose. We rearranged some of them and filled in all the empty spots. I spent the rest of the day bumbling about with laundry, feeding the wood burning stove and puttering about in the garage. I did manage to get the automatic garage door openers rewired so I did not have to use the remote to open the durned thangs. Good to get something accomplished. Oh, and I finally put up the wall Spackle over the patches in the closet wall. Now for the paint and the new shelves ... I can finally put my clothing in the same room I sleep in!

Technorati Tags:Snow | Weekend | Lawn | Christmas | Children

Labels: Banalities, Children, Church, Home Improvements, Lawn, Lumberjack, Mundane, Rain, Snow, Weather, Winter, Wood

Standard day: Wake, get kids up (pee first) and let them watch 'I Spy' on TiVo, let dogs out, feed 'em, get kids breakfast ready, feed 'em too, empty wood stove, set up firewood in stove for the evening (all the Mrs needs to do is toss in a match), shower, drive kids to school, drive to work, work ... work ... go pick up tyrants, go swimming, go to Karate, do kick drills with tyrants, run through adult Karate class, go home, kiss tyrants goodnight, eat, shower watch 'The Tick', go to bed. Deviations; It was foggy this morning, and I'm learning a new form in Karate: Pyong-Ahn Oh Dan. The part of the form where you leap through the air, twist, and then land with your legs crossed with a low 'X' block? Yeah, that's going to be rough on the old knee.

Oh, and as for that image above ... NICE! I'm talking about the gasoline price ... $1.09 ... wow.

Technorati Tags:Gas | Swimming | Karate | Children

Labels: Banalities, Blogging, Children, Fog, Gas, Karate, Swimming, Tang So Doo, Weather

Hoookay then. Another weekend under the belt to make me wiser and older ... more of the second than the first of course. For all the plans I made earlier in the week, having the Grand Parent Patrol about helped out a bit. Friday night, of course, ended with Dodge Ball and there was much fun and pummeling to be had. And that was the extent to which things were dealt with on Friday evening. Application of force. Little stuff like plastering & painting the wall patches, cutting and putting polyurethane on wood, nailing up molding, clearing leaves, harvesting the last of the veggies, tilling under the agricultural sector, running telecommunications wire, installing break-out boxes ... none of that got done. Although, when Gramps did have some spare time, we managed to replace one spigot in the rear of the manor that was leaking and the closet space that needed 'dressing up' was completed. Most of our time was spent shopping at the Local Home Depot Temple though ... which had it's own tales. We managed to visit on a day where they were giving away free hot-dogs and 'sliders' (greasy cheese burgers) so that made it worth the trip right there. Nothing like hot dogs with Düsseldorf mustard at the depot. So, the mrs almost has her closet space ready (I still need to cut the shelfs to length) and we have one spigot that may need 'professional' attention. It's right above the electrical circuit breaker box so I'm a wee bit wary of cracking that open right now. Next weekend, I may get that Telcom wire run though. It's cool enough to visit the attic without bursting into a puddle of sweat. In fact, I started up the wood burning stove this weekend. Yes, the crisp chill of winter has finally made itself known ... in the inviolate sanctuary of our Master Suite. Makes it really tough to get up in the morning, don't ya know. So, that made the Daylight savings sleep-a-thon a delight. I managed to get that hour back AND make breakfast before heading off to our church for some Sunday Morning Catechism. Then, the day ground down to a fine powdery residue as Grams cooked up a fine dinner and Gramps confiscated the 'indoor green-house' for growing God-Knows-What at his Agri-Bio-Tech company. Me, I just planted garlic among the seedling hybrid willow trees for next year's harvest.

Final note, I was supposed to get my flu shot this fine Monday morning but due to a change in policy with the subcontractor who does these things, I now need a note from my doctor that it is ok. You see, because I have a neurological disorder, that makes me a high risk factor. Just the ppl you want getting the damn shot. So I called the doc, went to pick up the script, and by the time I managed to wend my way back, the sub-contractor had closed up shop. I had to reschedule for next week. Gha!

Technorati Tags:Weekend | Grandparents | Dodge Ball | Children | Plumbing

Labels: Banalities, Children, Chores, Church, Dodge Ball, Family, Flu Shot, Gardening, Grandparents, Home Improvements, Multiple Sclerosis, Plumbing, Weather, Winter

Busy weekend ... well, not really. In actuality, a lot of nothing was done. Oddly, it was more exhausting than if I had actually done something productive. Saturday was primarily spent by me waffling about in bed somewhere between a lucid state and the bizarre dreamland I love to inhabit. The Grandparents were down so the Tyrants had little interest in me. Rustle up some bacon/eggs/toast for a family breakfast. Do a bit of laundry ... bumble about the manor and then go down into the chilled cellar to fill up a cooler with beer (IPA, Victory Lager, Victory V12, Chimay, Mikes Hard Lemonade ) for a party with the Butler/Seliga Clan at 1600 hours. It was SWELTERING hot the whole time. As sure as the sun rises in the east, the pool was somewhere near freezing though. So, the Tyrants were in and out of the pool like flying fish while the adults tried to sooth their beleaguered, senses by sloshing alcohol down their gullets in a feeble attempt to either numb the screaming senses or add a natural cooling agent to the system. Not a bad night all in all though. The party was for one of the extended family who is a Philly police officer and he had his partner and a few of his work friends there. He has made it his (jokingly) intention to make sure he has the opportunity to arrest everyone in his family at some point. Great guy though. Just got a dog, a Doberman. Named him 'Thor'. Go figure.

Sunday, ugh. Too much beer. Just a bit sluggish getting up so we went to the 1000 mass instead of the 0830. Since we were on the later side of the morning, we went out to the Warminister Diner for breakfast. By far, one of the best diners we have visited. They staff did not have the effrontery to deign our order too big to serve all at once so there was very little room on the table top. It was a rather good meal but we had some problems with the Tyrants and their eating habits. Alexis, once she got her waffles, did not want them. Jake was fidgety and had problems consuming his bacon and flap-jacks. They were still a bit tired from the previous night and were a bit gummed up (given that they primarily consumed chips, dip and cheese). Their digestive system is used to more ... 'healthy' food. Jake frequently requests chicken or pasta instead of junk food. Well, that is, when he is NOT insisting we buy a brick-oven pizzeria to sate his appetite for pizza at every meal. Later that day, the Grandparents packed up their belongings and we strapped the Tyrants into the back of their troop transport. You see, they were going to 'host' the Twin Tyrants of Turpitude for a week. Genghis and Attila treated this with great gravitas and spent most of the day inquiring if everything was ready to go. They had great interest in escaping the Manor for a quieter, gentler time at the FOB. I cannot imagine their spirits being any higher once they were trundled up and slowly cruised off into the horizon. Then ... silence.

We missed the children greatly. Sure, there was no early morning battle to get everything ready and no harrowing rush at the end of the day to start the extra-curricular activities. We got up a bit later and still made it to work (Well, I did. The Lovely Mrs took some time off from work.) early. Plugged through the day and took a 15 minute trip to get back to the manor. We went off to deal with some financial fallout from the Annual Budget Considerations and then enjoyed a wonderful early 11th anniversary dinner at Savona. It was distinguished by the lack of our little heartbeats making sure we were aware of their blessed presence. Sure, I talk glowingly of them when I'm hundreds of miles away ...

Technorati Tags:Anniversary | Weekend | Family | Party | Summer

Labels: Beer, Children, Family, Grandparents, Sleep, Summer, Weather, Weekend

Well, it looks like the GrandParent Patrol will not be able to make a fly-by this weekend. Other plans, with each-other, don't ya know. No way I could possibly blame them for that! So, they'll be down the following week when the Karate test is going on ... that should be fun. Pizza afterwards ... I'll bring the wine again. The kids mattress pickup will have to wait a week ... I'm sure it will do. I'm thinking about setting up Jakes bed and letting him sleep on the sofa [ed. not as punishment mind you, he LOVES sleeping on the softer sofa.] till we actually use Gramp's Big Black Truck (tm) to pick up the bedding.

In news closer to this temporal moment, I got to work before 0800 today since I am now in my support rotation. Bleh, hope things go smoothly over the weekend. There has been a shake-up in the 3rd level support group and most of the seasoned handlers were moved into 'research' positions. That leaves us with a whole new crop of green personnel to break in. I'm not in the mood either. I'm still waking up in pain from my back and now a muscle in my side is acting up because of overcompensation. I blundered through swimming, karate and adult karate last night with little issue, but I have to keep it simple so I do not aggravate anything before next weekend. And yes, I still need to mow the damn lawn. And fertilize it ... and put up the molding in the MBR ... and 100 other little tasks that I never seem to get around too. At least the garden looks nice!

Technorati Tags:Lawn | Swimming | Karate | Injury | Plumbing

Labels: Family, Gardening, Grandparents, Home Improvements, Injury, Karate, Lawn, Swimming, Tang So Doo, Weather

So, Jake wanders into the bedroom where I'm still trying to shake off another restless night of sleep. He comes over to my side of the bed and whispers: "Daddy, I want to play some more chess, please." Ghaaa. My attempt at exposing him to higher strategy has backfired in the most awful way. Monday night, I got out the marble chess set that Big Little Brother had given me as a Christmas Present nearly 20 years ago. I set up the pieces and explained to Jovial Jake what each piece does. He gravitated towards the Knights but he mimicked my standard pawn opening moves. Here is the rough part; I gave him no quarter. After the 3rd loss, he was quite upset that I kept taking all his pieces. He was a bit watery eyed, but I explained to him that if he kept playing, he would get better and better and some day, he would take all my pieces. I want to make sure that he is a gracious winner as well as a good loser. Having nobility in success and failure is something that is not really taught these days. You see, everyone gets to be a 'winner' so nobody gets their feelings hurt. So, I hurt his feelings but explained to him that it can be ok to loose as long as you try your hardest. In successive games, I showed him how he could put me into check so as to force me to give up pieces ... he was quite giddy to have a modicum of power over his father even if it did not involve fists. After a bit, I let him know it was time for bed ... which lead to the morning confrontation. On top of that, I gave him that book; Dangerous Book for Boys ... he was THRILLED. So much so that he insisted that I teach him to read 'RIGHT NOW!'. Heh, let's try the little words first buddy.

We had quite a rain storm yesterday afternoon. If the rain came down any harder, it would have left dents in the roadways from the kinetic energy dissipation. Spot flooding was inevitable, Noah was dusting off his tools. Indeed, this only happened because I left my car windows open a crack so the interior would not be molten. Somehow, the rain radically changed direction to a horizontal vector as it neared my POS Saturn and the drivers seat was completely saturated within minutes. Nothing like driving with a 'moist' seat. When I did manage to pound through traffic and get to the Day Care/ReEducation Camp, I found a woman and her two small children woefully gazing out the front door ... probably watching to see when her car would float away. She was wearing Hospital Scrubs and I knew that the only material more transparent when wet would be one of those Hollywood sheer gowns that the 'Beautiful People' like to flaunt their bodies about in. Not something you want your children to observe though. So, the gracious being that I am, I offered to escort her and her children to their car. It worked out well except she got a bit wet on the back of her blouse. The kids were dry ... mostly. I had to grab her daughter's hand and lift her over Lake Superior when we got to the parked car. There was about 2 inches of standing water in the lot at the time. My boots are still wet. Smelly too. No matter, I did my best to reverse the karmic slide I've been on lately. Maybe I'll get to sleep in this weekend ... fat chance.

Finally, I found this somewhere ... but lost the source. The wise words of Kahlil Gibran:

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.

Technorati Tags:Rain | Chess | Swimming | Children | Family

Labels: Chess, Children, NorEaster, Traffic, Weather

Hoooo-Doggie! What a day it was yesterday for anyone trying to get from point A to sub-station 011-937B. We had some fairly good thunderheads roll through the area. That let a cascade of rain and electric discharge fall to the ground like a sign of the end of times. Of course, with lightning there is the inevitable closure of the indoor pool. Not that I weep over the missed opportunity of freezing my gluts off in the near zero kelvin contents of the pool. With rain comes the 'instant asshole' aspect of driving about this region. While slugging my way to the day-care/re-education facility, I heard over the radio about 3 overturned trucks and an explosion on the NJ Tpk. I felt a bit of Schadenfreude when I heard, but quickly got my come-uppance. Right at the intersection of Sawmill and Dresher. At 1605, a blue pickup transporting 2 hillbillies made a right on red (in spite of what the sign said about that) just as a blue civic was passing (at about 30mph) a line of cars piled up in the left lane of intersecting traffic. BLAM! The pickup (heavy construction vehicle type) was thrust up onto the berm next to the road and bits of the civic rained down on the wet, steamy pavement. It was obvious that the compact vehicle would not be going anywhere since it absorbed the kinetic energy with a direct impact to the grill by the I-Beam that the truck was sporting. The hood buckled such that it's apex was higher than the roof of the copula. The burly man in the pickup, took a final drag from his cigarette and flung it brusquely to the ground to elaborate the words that were spilling out between his snarled lips. Within SECONDS, a police cruiser and an EMT vehicle pulled up. It was rather surreal that they were within the proximity of the accident at the moment it occurred. Now, this all sounds like a facinating road-show for me, but the arrival of the cruiser resulted in some unanticipated side effects. The intersection is equipped with a sensor that detects the flashes of an on-coming emergency vehicle and overrides the normal program for the signal lights. Yes, it stayed red for 15 minutes till the police realized that the traffic delay was not because of rubber-necker, but rather, because his override signal was still on. Needless to say, I was only 1 car from the light and when I was released from my unintentional imprisonment in Hatboro Gitmo, I could see the horrific results. It was backed up for a mile already and this would only get worse when the local school let out in a few minutes and rush hour would begin in earnest. I could predict much fulmination and gesticulation would be commencing soon. Much of it not from my participation in the local road rage full contact sports league.

It's kindergarten. Yes, only 10 meters away from the other room that the Tyrannical Twins where in, but it might as well have been another planet with an alien culture that ate molten rocks for nutrients. The first day was the worst. The minute we walked in, the children who had been promoted previously and their fellow graduated immediately rushed us shrieking the names of the twins. I thought for sure that we would shortly become beset by a tribe of Comanche Warriors or Bedouin Fighters. Today, we were wary and set up a defensive perimeter before trying to breach the portal to the dark side of Kindergarten. It was a bit smoother, but I still felt the chill of doom about me as we entered. Next week, it's 'summer camp', with is essentially showing up at the same place but they go on field trips every day. To the ice cream shop, or the local pub. Fridays is water-play day though. They even have planned trips to the Lego and Crayola factories. I'm going to see if they are interested in going to Cabela's or Graterford Penitentiary too. You know, just for balance.

Technorati Tags:Kindergarten | Swimming | Weather | Children | Traffic

Labels: Banalities, Children, Traffic, Weather

Yeah, that TSD thing ... unintended consequences. I'll get to that in a few paragraphs. But since I did a roundup earlier in the week, I have a few days of material to banter on about. Since it was a sloppy day on Monday and Wednesday, I took the Tyrannical Twins of Turpitude to the pool instead of letting them batter each-other silly on the driveway with their jousting equipment and 'Road-Warrior' bicycles. That was saved for Tuesday. The pool, however, seems to have a broken heat pump. Not fun. I think I was one of the titanic elderly women run up against an iceberg and sink to the bottom of the pool. Not enough life-boats. Horrible tragedy. Even with the fantastic spectacles of swimmers in cryogenic deep-freeze, the tyrants did not last for more than 45 minutes before their blue lips and shivering spats coerced them out of the drink.

TSD (karate) was a different matter all together. Everything was fine in the children's class. I've taken a few turns with leading the calisthenics part. I seem to be a natural fit for that task. I do a lot of barking and drill sergeant type harassing so that the usual offenders don't have enough moxie to start acting up. Got a question for me? Five push-ups for the privilege, 10 if it is a BS question. Complaining about somebody else not working hard enough? 10 pushups for both of ya. Need to go potty? Kleenex? Drink of water ... Yep, give me 10 and the answer is NO. Everyone tends to fall in line and get it over with ASAP. I missed my calling, I tell ya. Either a Marine Boot Camp Drill Instructor or a Kindergarten Teacher. That's all fine and well. The messy stuff happened during an adult class sparring session. I've been feeling pretty cocky of late and I figured I'd go ahead and try one of those legendary Chinese Flying anti-gravity leap-kicks. You know, the Crouching Tiger, Hidden Ligament Failure types. So, I fly through the air and start my dumb-ass fantasy maneuver and realize that what goes up, usually comes down at 9.8 meters/second/second. Hmmm, Force equals mass times acceleration and I've got a whole mess-o-mass to work with. Needless to say, I did not get through the pounds to kilogram conversion before I found myself laying on the floor simpering like a school-girl who got jelly on her Sunday Dress. Well, that was the end of my sparring for the evening. Even worse, I had to go back and fess up to the Mrs that I screwed the pooch again. Fortunately, I was wearing my I-Beam reinforced knee brace at the time so the injury was rather mild. That, or I'm getting used to being dismembered.

In the more mundane and amusing categories, I managed to enjoy a few quiet moments with the Mrs on the front porch the other night. Over the Memorial day weekend, I purchased a wood/iron wrought bench that took about 25 minutes to assemble. The weather was mild enough and the insects were still recovering from the rainstorms so all we had to worry about was the strength of the wireless hub signal for our laptop systems. Well, her system. I was busy finishing up my 2nd glass of Australian Shiraz for the night (aptly named Jacobs Creek). Earlier in the evening I had polished off 2 Flying Fish IPAs as well. Yeah, I was flying too. So much so that I even got a bit nervous when the police cruiser rolled by for the nightly patrol. Don't need any charges of public drunkenness or lewd behavior tacked on to my name. I still have a pretty good reputation around here. That, or they patrol the neighborhood to see if I'm out in the yard digging holes again after sunset. Whatever could I be doing? Looking for sprinkler system leaks? Planting bulbs? Hiding 55 gallon drums filled with survival gear, weapons and C4? Bodies? (insert evil laugh here).

Finally, the most amusing detail of the last few days. Monday is pasta and meat-ball day for the Tyrants' lunch. They were treated to 2 large meatballs and 2 large cheese and spinach ravioli. You mix cheese, pasta and spinach ... well, you do not notice the spinach so much if you are a youngster. So, when the Tyrants insisted that I relinquish the information regarding their devoured lunches, I acquiesced and revealed the secret ingredient. Jake retorted: "I love spinach!". Popeye never had it so good. Wait till I slip a leaf or two into their salads; I'll be dealing with the request for anchor tatoos on their forearms.

Technorati Tags:Spinach | Family | Karate | Children | Wine | Spinach

Labels: Children, Family, Karate, Swimming, Weather

So, it was a fairly laid-back weekend for the Family Haupertonian. The Hazy sun blasting down the unshakable heat and the air, laden with moisture, enabling every item of clothing to stick like RTV adhesive to the flesh. Yep, summer is here. It was even accompanied by the Trademarked philly super-soaker thunderstorms. It's hot and humid, it rains to the point of flooding, then the sun comes out and heats it up even more with the additional hot rain humidity. YUM! In between the environmental weather artifacts, we had a picnic on the deck with the Tyrannical Twins. Chips, cheddar-wursts, carrot sticks and roast Pterodactyl. Delish! After roasting in the sun while trying to imitate the Ever Lovely Mrs broiling herself under the cosmic radiation (Yeah, she looks a bit like this when she does that, except with raven black hair), the retired to the cool darkness of the Manor Inner Sanctum for a nap and a bit of .... NASCAR! My little man loves his car racing. It all goes back to that pixar animation movies; Cars. I'm so proud, he is gearing up to be the best damn red-neck a parent could hope for. Could be a Governator some day! Durned tootin'!

Sunday was more of the same, but a bit less in quantity. Since I swam a mile while mowing the lawn on the previous day, I was not disturbed by the intermittent downpours which punctuated the day like small arms fire on the western front. Church went well and once we arrived back at the manor with a small box Dunkin Donuts, we ran into Gus on his way out to give an estimate for a kitchen job. We talked for a bit and the kids goofed with high-fives till he had to get going. We then put the Mastodons back into the kennel before banging on Gus's back door to pay a visit to his Gracious Mrs; Irene. She is apparently a linguist of sorts and can speak Greek (of course), French, Latin and was learning some Korean. No simple house-wife! We spoke of Cyprus and the Greek Islands while the kids rambled through her well kept home. Soon enough, the Mrs called wondering why there was nobody home but all the doors were unlocked ... and the hounds running wild throughout the manor first floor. So, she came over and we all had a good sit till Alexis became impatient. Not a bad way to burn a Sunday Morning. The rest of the day was spent on laundry, minor perfunctory manor dalliances and shredding all junk mail. I spread this in the garden to keep the weeds down. Did I mention that the tomatoes are forming? I've got about 5 now that are roughly 10cm in diameter. Lettuce is ready for munching and some of the broccoli is good to go as well. In spite of the little green caterpillars (picked them off by hand, little buggers), it looks like the cabbage will be set in a few weeks as well. Time to call in the migrant farm-hands to start the harvest!

Technorati Tags:Weekend | Gardening | Picnic | Children

Labels: Family, Gardening, Lawn, Weather, Weekend

For a Friday, there is not much to really mumble about. Just the standard tripe like mowing the lawn, busting my ass in TSD, laundry, etc. The extra-ordinary elements such as the advent of summer uniform season have already been alluded to. This is good in light of the arrival of the omnipresent humidity which will haunt me till well after labor day. It rained last night and in the spirit of the Atlantic Coastal region, it just got hotter after the rainfall and it feels like someone slapped me down with a heavy quilt saturated with water heated to a point where my skin feels like it is being blanched off my body. On top of that, the weed-killer I put on the front pastoral expanse did not have the time to take effect and now I'll need to get some herbicide that has no fertilizer added to it so I do not poison the grass with phosphates and nitrogen. Gha! And to complicate my Good YardKeeping efforts even further, mowing wet grass is not going to happen. I need a good 4-6 hours of sunlight to dry out the jungle or it will just clump up and make a mess. If it's dry, that means all the hydration has been absorbed into the already supersaturated air. Yeah, this is why you all come here. To listen to me whine about the damned lawn. What was my tag line again? Oh yeah:

Life of the mundane middle class, in painful scrutiny

Heh, true to my roots, eh? Maybe I'll kvetch about the garden next week.

Technorati Tags:Lawn | Summer | Karate

Labels: Banalities, Gardening, Lawn, Weather

Well, the last few days have been ... gone in a trice. Perhaps it's the TSD (taking a tip from Charlie on the PA Turnpike here) that is shortening my days and giving me the prepotency to ignore the less glamorous aspects of my engagement with reality. Work issues, although oppressive and unending (I am now on phone support duty for the weekend) seem to hold less sway over me. Perhaps it was my unparalleled planning (read: luck) that I mowed the pastoral expanse AND the back 50 last night before taking the kids to TSD practice. You see, it rained for 40 days and 40 nights over the last few hours. That would mean the spring growth would be nearly impossible to hack down to size next weekend and I would be slaving away on the lawn for HOURS instead of concentrating on the garden or flower beds. I could only assume that the genetically altered inhabitants of the blighted jungle would try to usurp the Haupertonian empire and conduct a putsch against me ... probably aided by the Twin Tyrants of Turpitude. Nope, the lawn is mowed so I need not dither with that nonsense. All the Mountains of Mastodon Manure have been leveled so the Weekend Doggie Dip Date has been obviated. Since I'm on duty, I'll not see much of the Ever Tolerant Mrs or the Tyrants. All the better to do lawn work till the inevitable signal flare from the Titanic is sent up. I'll be certainly quite circumspect when that happens.

Going back to the TSD class. Over the last few days, I'm fairly certain that I have punished every sweat gland on my body to a point where they have just about given up hope of ever being the same again. Nothing like a 500% turnover of body fluids. Part of this has to do with the intense scrutiny of my forms for the upcoming test in a few weeks. Yep, the Tyrants are going to attempt their Yellow Belt and I'm shooting for the Green. At that point, I'll start on my staff forms (Korean:bong) and I'll be eligible to be buffeted about the head and shoulders in sparring. Of course, not that I've managed to crack the code of higher kicks (rotate your back foot instead of twisting your knee-cap off, dummy), I'll have a slim chance of dishing out at least a tenth of what I graciously accept (thank you sir, may I have another!) My limbs are still quite stubbornly disobedient in many cases. I just cannot seem to get the precision down and that is more damaging to my unwitting partners. More than once I've given a hearty, swift kick to what I was envisioning as the Solar Plexus only to have the foot firmly contact the 'man junk'. The target is rarely amused. I've gotten two nicknames out of this ... one is the 'Steel Crane' for my jerky, robotic formality in which I grind through my forms. The other, is "Uggghhhhhh!". Well, that's what they usually call me when I'm asking the prone figure grasping their groin after I've walloped them in the twig and berries if they are OK. Yeah, I'm sensitive like that.

Technorati Tags:Karate | Children | Plumbing | Lawn Mowing

Labels: Karate, Lawn, Spring, Weather

If you have seen the docudrama 'An Inconvenient Truth' by AlGore, I would recommend that you watch this set of videos (8 parts) of a BBC (of all people!) program that is a counterpoint to the argument.

If you are intrigued, visit the rest:Part2 Part3 Part4 Part5 Part6 Part7 Part8

Technorati Tags:Gas

Labels: Hybrid Cars, PSA, Weather

Nada. Yep, another zero post. Yeah, sure, I went to adult karate practice and found that I'm still not at 100%. And yes, I let the Tyrants off the hook so they could stay at the Manor and suck every last drop of life out of Gung-Gung. Oh, they did eat their dinner in record time the last two nights knowing that the extended play period was waiting for them. They certainly enjoyed playing in the snow we got yesterday ... REAL SNOW. None of this ice/sleet crap. A whole INCH of snow. My neighbor, Gus, even went so far as to get out his snow blower to clear his driveway. Not very effective on such a light dusting. As far as I can tell, most of the fluffy white power has evaporated in areas exposed to sunlight. So, no snowmen this year. Oh, and gasoline is at $2.57USD here. I suppose the extraordinary cold helped jack up those prices. Makes you wonder why oil futures are so strong while the market 'adjustments' are bringing everything else down.

Technorati Tags:Gas | Swimming | Karate | Children | Snow

Labels: Banalities, Children, Weather, Winter

Ahhh... The sweet, sweet taste of oxygen deep within my avioli. It's nice to have the facilities and ability to take a full gust of air into my chest without lapsing into a clattering hacking fit. With the help of an Albuterol inhaler four times a day and an HFA inhaler twice a day ... and some ampacillin once a day ... and some armed pixies escorting the deionized oxygen molecules past the speutum in my bronchial tubes. Mmmm, the taste of coagulated mucus mixed with albuterol still lingers on my palet like the fading flavors of a fine burgundy vintage. Honestly though, I don't know how anyone with asthma can stand the aftertaste of the stuff ... so acerbic. Now I think I have an idea of what vitriol really feels like in the tongue. On top of that, the steroids keep me much to alert at night. Nasty stuff, don't get hooked. Just say no.

Adult karate has been good to me over the last couple of days. It's nice to get back to the sweat, the pummeling and the evening aches. Honestly though, I need to keep on top of this or my natural state of slackerdom and inaction will take over and the 'plumping' will begin. Since I have a full physical (reccomended by my medical team ... it's been a while) scheduled for April, it would be nice to not hear the sharp inhales as they review my blood pressure, weight and chemical breakdowns of the various samples. Yeah, I'm coming in on 40 and we all know what that means for men. PSA. < shudder >

On the way home the other night, I found that they had closed a road (Maple) at that one particularly dangerous spot. Just at the south end of the Naval Air Base where the Elementary school is and all the accidents happen. The local STS surveyors and a small cadre of 'dirt grunts' were milling about, generally making a hazard of themselves. In the end, if they do put a light it it will be a boon for my commute, but a curse for everyone else. I suppose it's for the best, people do stupid things when they have not had their morning coffee. There have been a series of rather horrific accidents in the area and many of them are of the 'T-Bone' variety ... never a good thing. There is a lot of school bus activity between the bus depot at the elementary school and the High-School on the other side of the base ... people tend to make assumptions about that and the are correct 9 times out of ten. The other 10% is where we have issues. Traffic Light:Good, Personal Responsibility to make Rational Assesments:Bad.

Hmmm, other stuff. The 'snow' we had here last week was followed up by more 'snow' [read: crappy sleet and freezing rain] with more forecasted for later in the week. Bletch. On the upside, the kids are happy to be swimming and are doing ok in karate. Alexis is back-sliding a bit, but Master Smith recognizes this as a typical behavior pattern and is going to 'deal' with it. With burgeoning population of lilliputian TSD students, he is considering a special test to bump them up to Yellow belt. They probably would not survive the normal test. Since he is just recovering from a similar run-in with the virus patrol (he teaches children, thusly, is exposed to the same onslaught of daily viral and bacterial attacks), he is still trying to get his legs under him. This will be interesting to watch. Jake will certainly get pumped about the 'board-break'. The weeks of him trying to break everything in sight afterwards will be challenging. I'll have to head off to the Home Depot Temple and pick up some thin pine slats to give him a harmless outlet.

Had a work related class to attend last Friday. It was not particularly revolutionary in it's concepts. I've been doing similar stuff for Requirements Traceability and Leveling for quite some time. The interesting aspects were the ancillary data. Things like the instructor (Dr BeetleButt) going to the wrong site thinking the class was in NJ instead of Pennsyltucky. That resulted in the class starting 2 hours late. That, and the class was scheduled to be 4 hours but should have been 6 hours. So now, we are running up against my departure time of 1600 hours. Not good. The Prof was one of those standard academic types. In fact, he as an epitome of the stereotype you are probably envisioning in your mind's eye. Leather elbow patches on a tweed jacket, the cumbersomely thick glasses, beard and matching chrome-dome, loafers and dark turtle neck stretched to it's limit over an obtrusive pot belly. If he had a pipe to periodically chomp on while gazing off into the horizon while deeply contemplating the underlying basis for a student's question. So, I completed the class, took the test and got one question wrong. Which one? Dunno. Gotta keep the students from writing all the questions down and distributing them. Sheesh, we are all adults here and this type of Frat-House behavior ... aw, never mind.

Oh, and could you all wish the Ever Beautiful Mrs a happy BD? She is going to be ... ummm, young ... yes, very young again at the end of this month. Happy Birth Day Honey, and here is to you sharing another 100 or so with me.

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Technorati Tags:Old Lady | Illness | Karate | Children | Traffic

Labels: Banalities, Children, Illness, Weather

ALERT! It is snowing in SE Pennsyltucky. It might even stick to the non-paved surfaces till the morning sun obviates it. BTW, the picture in no way represents what is going on outside.

Technorati Tags:Snow

Labels: Weather