White Lightning Axiom: Redux

Since it was Girl Scout Daisy brownie night, I was tasked with escorting Ghengis to the superfluous practice for swimming. You got to show up at the practice or you don't get to swim, eh? Anyways, in a giant cinder block bunker full of water, you can pretty much expect that I would find NO wifi, let alone an unencrypted source to hijack. So be it. TSD class, we had the usual rigmarole with a few exceptions: First, Attila had to leave early. Every other Thursday ... its an accepted event now. The unanticipated event was that one of the newer students, a rather young boy, was much too involved with the activities that he was not going to ask to leave the mat so that he could relieve himself. So, what to do, what to do. Well, certainly, just have a BM right there in your tightie-whities and soldier forth! Except he had not counted on the load bearing capacity to be exceeded by quite so much mass. A bit escaped and was swiftly trampled into a wafer thin sheen spanning about a 3 meter radius that encompased the realm of his form footprint. Once the 'crime' had been observed and dutifully reported by the other students (read: everyone shouting "Eeeewwwwww!"), I swiftly whisked him off the floor to the boy's room and we provided him with a plastic bag and a change of uniform. He still carried a persistent odor about, but we impressed upon the other students that we shall not speak of it. Everyone has an off day, a little compassion will work off some bad karma. That little adventure gobbled up 15 minutes of my time, but actually gave me something to blather about. Tomorrow: Pinewood Derby of Dooooom trumps DodgeBall TSD.

Technorati Tags:Poop | Swimming | Karate | Children | Dodge Ball | Scouts

Labels: Children, Dodge Ball, Karate, Poop, Scouts, Swimming

I'm so ready for spring. No, really. I usually revel in the winter months, but after seeing our last utility bill ($300!?), I've had enough. For all you global warming folks, why is this past January 8 degrees colder than last year? Yeah, yeah, it's weather, not global climate. As far as I can tell though, the less carbon-based heating utilities I use, the colder I get! I guess I should blame that damn groundhog. No matter. Last night I canceled the cub-scout den meeting since we have a pack meeting this Friday for the Pinewood Derby. Spent the night at TSD and did not get beaten too badly. This week has been dull. That old Chinese Curse: "May you live in interesting times", yeah ... I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. In the mean time, I'll just keep re-arranging the deck chairs.

Technorati Tags:Scouts | Karate | Children | Winter

Labels: Children, Karate, Scouts, Winter

Here I sit at the piano class waiting room. Listening to the melodic plunking of little fingers over the faux ivory ... and the periodic admonishments of the instructor to my little Imp, Ghengis. He is getting into trouble again, so it's probably time for another lecture. While I stew over my parental duties, I tried to hijack a wireless signal, to no avail. Must be the higher humidity in the air. I did get a hint ... just a wiff of a bit of a signal, only to have it melt away like foie gras on a steaming slab of porterhouse steak. Mmmm, steak. But I digress. I could titillate you with mundane tales of my work day. Where I sit with the team as we try to figure out just what in the world we plan on doing in the next sprint. Ah, yes, the scent of failure is in the air. We are probably just going to work on some left-over cruft from the last sprint cycle. The last team just DUMPED it and said they were 'done'. Not so much, really. So be it.

I've been working with the kids on finishing their dinner in a timely manner. It would be much easier if I could sit with them while they eat, but time is short and I have a heap of chore to grind through before we head off each afternoon. This is a beast of my own creation and I'm going to have to be creative (or persistent) to overcome it. Speaking of persistence, this is a TSD week. I'll be in the Child and Adult classes every day except Friday when we have a tour at WRDV with the cubs. We'll do pizza after wards before heading over to the 'Dodge Ball Session', but I'll not stay for the adult class after 1900 hours as I will be doing my bi-monthly work poker cameo ... just to bolster that coworker relationship thing. Anything to make sure I'm held in the highest esteem when the axe falls on the work-force.

Finally, can SOMEONE tell me why oil prices are staying at $40/bbl but gas prices are nearly at $2/gal? Are the refineries cutting back on production? CRAP! I just looked and the price is now at $38/bbl. Whiskey Tango Foxtrot!

Technorati Tags:Gas | Swimming | Karate | Children | Scouts | Piano | Work

Labels: Banalities Work, Children, Gas, Karate, Piano, Scouts, Swimming

Playing catch-up again here. It was quite a busy weekend and I did not get half of what I wanted done in the time that I had allotted to myself. The grand ball of delicate maneuvers started on Friday Night. After wrapping up the kids TSD class with the usual Battle Royall Dodge Ball Melee, I scuttled on back to the Haupertonian manor to prepare for the next week. Since I knew I would be occupied with peripheral tasks, I chose to make as much of the meals we would be consuming and bundle them up in nice little packages for each day. Provincial Chicken with Herbs and Garlic ... along with 6 bacon wrapped cheddar wursts. The Mrs loves bacon-baked chicken. I sprinkle a cup of rice along the bottom of the 18 inch skillet befor putting it in the oven for 90 minutes and the rice soaks up all the goodness. Yeah, I'm not supposed to be eating that sort of stuff, so that's why I canceled my Cardiologists Appointment. I also prepped 10 hard boiled eggs and started defrosting the lobster and little smokeys that the Tyrants like to snack on between activities. It's all a labor of love. The love of food is the most genuine love of all. That's a pithy quote that I cannot find an attribution for. Maybe I just made it up but I find it hard to believe that I am the initiator of something that ... Confucian. And, of course, there are a couple of other dishes ... mundane stuff like mac-n-cheese or spags-n-balls that I had to plow under. I tend to be happiest when I'm in the kitchen.

Saturday was HORRENDOUS! We had four/five events set up. The first thing in the morning, we had to drag the Tumultuous Twins out of their warm and snuggly lairs so we could get some nutrition in their bellies and get off to the TSD Studio in time for their test. They had other ideas. In mortal combat, I did manage to stuff enough of their breakfast between their gritted teeth between crushing blows to my ribs and skull that they would be able to make it through the test without depleting their energy reserves. This, however, resulted in my total lack of time to feed my own gullet. They did well in the test, for the most part. Attila, for the first time, broke her board in the first kick, outperforming the rest of the red belt testers. This will put them on track for being Cho Dan Bo in May ... which will get them set up for being a Junior Black Belt at this time next year. But let us not count our chicks before they hatch. Right now, we will just need to learn their third weapon form (another staff form) and then get their previous forms cleaned up. Thinking about it ... just ... wow. They'll be seven which gives them a few years till they are out of the Manor. Now my test, good grief! To start off, I was not in my peak performance health. Then, my usual bent is to go all out which tends to leave me in an exhausted state nearly half way through my 'performance art'. The sparring is towards the end and I just SUCK OUT when I get to that point. I always have some fantastic ideas about what I'm going to do and how I'm going to 'Shock and Awe' my audience, but in the end I just stand there and throw single kicks or punches while getting pummeled by my opponent. (Insert long and depressed sigh here)

After I slithered out of the test as a slithering mass of pulsating pain, we stopped off for a bite of pizza with the rest of the available crew and celebrated our ability to put on a strong face in spite of the various wounds leaking precious body fluids. From there, it was on to a Swim Meet where, again, I had bathroom guard duty. It was steaming hot in there but I was required to stand fast and for good reason. The janitor had a peculiar predilection of creeping in the back door every so often and slum around in the bathroom stalls. Creepy. I did get to see their performance on the Mrs's laptop after she uploaded the video and pictures she took. That's her thing, I sit in the locker room and embrace the aroma of teen-age angst while she sits amongst throngs of semi-detached family members and chews through several packs of rechargeable batteries. Fair trade, I think.

Since this is Scout Week, we had a special mass at church for the cubs to attend. We all sat in the front row and periodically throughout the service, Father K would make mention of it. Really quite sweet actually. Both Attila and Ghengis were there in the front row along with the rest of the Horde. Since this was done at the 10am Family mass, I had to let the gals at the Sunday school go on without me. I hope they managed. After that, the Mrs took our little girl scout (Daisy, Brownie?) off to manage a cookie-pimping table at the local grocery store while I took my mini-me off to the movie theater. While Ghengis and I were slouching through a rather expensive matinee showing of 'Dog Hotel', the minions of cookie crook managed to offload 100 boxes of tasty diabetic failure. She has personally sold over 70 boxes now. At 3.50/box, they are doing a brisk business! We had a bit of time before the gals were done, so after the expensive movie, we took the Cybernetic Mammoths out and gave them a thorough scrub-down. They were beginning to get that particularly interesting smell that can only be described as "moldy sweat sock full of Doritos". Yeah ... they need to get out more but they are seriously 'indoor dogs'. Thor balks at any inclement weather outings. Big Sissy.

The rest of my time was allocated to showing Eldest Son how to do his next staff form and compelling him to keep on trying to ride his bike. He's getting a bit to big for it so I can see an Upgrade in the near future for him. He has the 'going straight really fast' down pat and the 'panicked emergency brake' ... the turning part is the stich right now. Other than that, the Mrs and I did a bunch of prep for the week. Clothes, swim gear, TSD props, lunches, etc... Same work, every week. Life is superb ... elegant ... and splendid (Ghengis's new word).

Crud, forgot to whine about gasoline prices. WTF! Why are they at nearly $2/g when the oil price is sticking to $40/bbl!? Damn crooks!

Technorati Tags:Gas | Swimming | Karate | Children | Weekend | Scouts

Labels: Children, Gas, Karate, Scouts, Swimming, Weekend