White Lightning Axiom: Redux: Neutralized

Thursday, August 18, 2005



THE KING IS DEAD! LONG LIVE THE NEW KING. Well, that can be said for these last few horrible weeks of summer. The temperature has dropped down to the upper 60's the last 2 nights and I've been beside myself. Ahhh, the joys of sleeping weather. Even the kids have gotten into the act and have been a little difficult (read: fiercely resistant) to wake up. Perhaps, if they would give up their night-owl habits it would not be such a drag (read: battle royal) to get them going in the morning. The Mrs used to be that way too but her multiple promotions and such have pretty much alerted her to the need to roll out of bed before noon. Ahhh, those were the days, but I'll not review what was lost when what we gained is so much more.

Speaking of gain, I was given a couple of shocks last night at the dinner table. Alexis is starting to get a little mind of her own these days. She's starting to give daddy a bit of her sass! I'm not sure she knows what she is implying when she says some of the things she does but the Mrs and I have a tough time not falling down in raucous laughter. We were talking about perceived slight that she was nursing and I told her:
"You're so full if poop that your eyes are brown!"
To which she responded: "NO! My eyes no brown, they are BLACK!"
Heh, black-eyed little monster, eh? Well, let's continue then.
"Really? What color is Mommy's hair?" I ask knowing that she could not see the Mrs's eyes.
"Black!" She shouts.
And what color is Jacob's hair?" ... "Ummmm, Browwnn."
And finally, "What color is Daddy's hair?"
Within a fraction of a second, she comes up with the most cutting remark, "GREY!"
The Mrs immediately goes into the convulsions while trying to swallow the food she was chewing and not spray it across the table. I sputter and retort that my hair is dirty blonde but find no sympathy in the audience. Hmph. We'll see who has grey hair! She came up with some other doosies that gave the Mrs and I a good belly laugh or two. Mostly about the confusions about how daddy is not a Man, but rather, a daddy. Never the two shall mix! She associates Man with Bad and only when she is comfortable with any particular man (uncle paul, gramps, etc...) will she allow them to graduate to the 'Not Man' category. Right now, I'm going to let that bias stand for a few (dozen) years till she learns some martial arts. Her only form of defense right now against 'Bad Man' is 1)Ear Piercing Scream 2)Hide behind daddy/mommy 3)200lb/square inch blow to the scrotum. I'm not joking about that last one. She has a vicious streak that needs some redirection. Martial arts would do nicely for that. It's all about the gains.


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