White Lightning Axiom: Redux

It all started on Friday afternoon. Relatively early since I managed to grind through my usual 80 hour work week quickly. Honestly, it's closer to 40 these days. I guess I'm guilty of working to the level of expectations right now, but I can live with that. I wanted to get home early on Friday so I could meet the sprinkler guy who is scheduled to show up at the manor between 1500 and 1600. As these things go, I understood that if I am late, he will be early and leave. If I'm early, he'll be late. The later is preferable since I want to chop down the jungle that has sprung up in the location that was once the front yard. When the sprinkler guy did finally show, I was nearly half done with the front yard. Ahh, the sprinklers. He got them working in no time. As a former computer technician, I believe in the magic of the specialist. Many times have I been called to the scene of a complete meltdown for a particular piece of technology only to find that by looking under the hood, all the symptoms and ailments simply go up in a puff of ether. All he did was to go to each control valve, open the cover and give it a good tap. The magic then invoked itself and the sprinklers worked like a charm. Black arts of water management I tell you! Expensive prestidigitation as well. So, the sprinklers are working and I now have a half lawn of wet grass to mow before heading off to pick up the inlaws from the train station. Oh, did I forget to mention that? Now that I am covered in wet grass clippings, I will be going out into the public eye to pick up my mother-in-law and the minister-in-training brother in law. They'll be so happy to be chauffeured by the 'Swamp Thing'.

The next day was one long string of activities. Swimming at 0830, which went very well. Alexis was completely in touch with her inner aqua being now that we figured out what her touch-stone was. All we need to do is bring a little yellow bath duckie. She was overjoyed and we presume it was that she associated that bath duck with the swimming-pool duck. Now, the pool is one giant bath-tub with unlimited license to splash mommy and daddy. No wailing at infinitely high octaves or the death-grip clutching of daddy. Yes, the whole 30 minutes was one long session of splashing, squirting, kicking and paddling. The Inlaws were there to take pictures the whole time and were significantly amused. You see, they are from Manhattan and the thought of swimming is a bit foreign. The Mrs does not know how to swim and I believe that is no different than the rest of her clan. Incentive: learn to swim and we will go on a Disney Cruise. 'Nuff said.

Perkins Saturday Pancake Bonanza went well. Not much to say about that. The big task of the day was to leave the kids with the In-Laws while the Mrs and I brought the Hounds to the Vet for the battery of shots and inoculations that they were due to get. Now there is an exhausting task. The dogs LOVE going to the vet. Of course, they love to play with the other 15 oz creatures that people call dogs. Not a good mix; 125 lb leviathan playing tag with a 5 lb fru-fru lap dog. They (the hounds) caught me off balance a couple of time before I got them calmed down. Since they were all worked up, a surplus of slobber was available for spraying as Thor shook his head vigorously due to the ear infection he managed to get again. Drool everywhere. The smaller animals headed for higher ground as wave after wave of saliva battered the occupants of the painfully small waiting room. That kind of performance typically gets us escorted into a private room quite quickly. From there on, things went pretty well. The Doc looked at the dogs and whistled. He knows them well and is aware that dealing with them makes him earn his fee. They like this particular vet (Dr Shields) and he has the dubious honor of getting head-butted to show for it. After a few shots, ear cleanings and nail clippings, they release Thor first and I walk him about the grounds for a bit while they cope with the more energetic Katie. The Mrs deals with the insurance and bills in the mean time. While walking about, I notice that the Japanese Split Leaf Red Maple out front is coming to the end of it's days. The bark is peeling away and revealing the grey and cracked bones of the trunk. Too much dog pee I suppose, but the visual is quite interesting to me. Half the tree is still alive, but the dead half is quite stark in contrast. I'll have to come by and take some B&W photos some time.

The rest of the day is consumed by my efforts to dig up the ground where I want to lay the original 25 lengths of sod + the 25 additional lengths that the Mrs picked up after the Vet Visit. It is slow going since the ground I am working with is like baked clay bricks. I have various implements laid out to attack this formidable foe that has manifested itself. One part dog pee, 2 parts Pennsylvania clay = one pisser of a time. I manage to muddle through in my own time after putting down a 6 pack of Mountain Dew and a liter of cranberry juice. I'll just have to make sure that the dogs use a different location to pee from now on. I'm thinking of opening up an area under the pine trees where grass will not grow. While I am scoping out the area under the pine forest, my gaze pans off to the uncompleted North Wall of the sand pit. Either the caffeine is giving me inspiration or the sun has cooked my grey matter in the bucket of a skull I have perched on my broad and muscle wrapped shoulders. Ok, that last part was not necessary, but it was a train-of-thought sort of thing. A more apt description would be 'clay speckled sheets of white flagging flesh' but that is not much of an ego booster! Anywho, I digress. I decide to start in on the north wall and have completed it before the chilly fingers of dusk rake across my ache riddled back ... oh, there I go again. Lets just say that the uncompensated workers completed the North wall even if it was a bit crooked. I'm caked with filth, sweat and sand. I need a shower and a shower is what I'll get. The rest of the evening is aptly described as a couple of tired kids laying on top of an equally exhausted daddy. A little untrue since Jacob is not really tired and escapes his containment unit a couple of times after his curfew. The Mrs goes to Lay with him after the 2nd successful escape and puts an end to his Houdini ways for the evening.

# posted by mdmhvonpa @ 8:23 AM